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Postgameheroes Hilarious (but True) QB Rankings
by No l Gravity l » Tue Jun 23, 2009 6:19 am
Smartmonies 2009 NFL Quarterback Rankings
By Dutch | June 20, 2009
-NFL QUARTERBACK RANKINGS-
1. BEN ROETHLISBERGER
Everything you would want in a Quarterback. Big, Strong, Mobile, tough, accurate, Poised, great thrower inside and outside the pocket.One man Gang. Tied for 5th all time highest yards per pass avg. Winner. Won first 14 games as a rookie. Most wins through first 5 years. Elevates his play in the playoffs. Operates behind the worst offensive line to have ever won a Superbowl. Great Road player. Carried team on back en route for 2nd Superbowl win in career. 121% 3rd down passer rating last 4 years in playoffs is #1 among all Quarterbacks.
2. TOM BRADY
Poised. Accurate. Plays his best when its us against the world. 3 time SB champ. cheated to win. 1st 3 Superbowl wins should contain 3 asterisks. Now has Moss opening up the field for him. Knee injury looms large.
3. PEYTON MANNING
Perhaps the greatest regular season Quarterback of all time. A fantasy Players dream pick. Will Continue to throw despite being up two scores inside 5 minutes. Loves pouring it on against bad defenses. Struggles against the 3-4 defenses. Media tends to over look his playoff failures. In 8 playoff losses his offense has only averaged 13 points per game. Accurate passer that makes quick decisions. played along side 2 quick speedy receivers inside a dome for nearly entire career.
4. DONOVAN MCNAAB
Only downfall is he plays in Philly where they don’t respect anything. Carries his team with subpar offensive weapons year in and year out. Leads his team deep into the playoffs annually. 2nd best all time in fewest interceptions per pass. Needs a Superbowl win to solidify his greatness.
5. KURT WARNER
One of the all time leaders in Yards per pass average. Winner. Feels more comfortable when he gets to throw the ball 35+ times a game. Has played with amazing receiving corps throughout his career. Decision making over rated by media. His Sack % increased to a morbid 12% with his stint with Giants when he didn’t have the quick speed receivers getting open for him like he had in St Louis and Arizona. Great character guy. Type of guy you meet at a grocery store.
6. PHILLIP RIVERS
Huge year in 2008. Led all Quarterbacks in yards per attempt. Sometimes questionable as a leader. Especially when he begins jawing at other teams fans. But showed leadership skills in 2007 playoffs playing on injury against Pats. Real threat of run game has helped. Has yet to show one man gang ability like Roethlisberger.
7. MATT RYAN
Looks like a man ahead of his time. Helped carry the Falcons to the playoffs in his first year. poised. high yards per attempt for a rookie. Ability to make plays. Will win a Superbowl someday.
8. DREW BREES
led the league in passing Yards. Almost broke Dan Marino’s all time passing yards record in a single season. Struggles on the road. 6 of 8 road games in 2008 he had below a 70% passer rating. perhaps a product of his environment. Throws well in a dome. Likes to throw all the time to take the pressure off of having to complete the passes. Tends to struggle in 4th Quarters. Struggles with winning.
9. CARSON PALMER
Not a Winner. Believes the hype that surrounds him. Bombs away approach results in quick score or quick punt. Either way, it leaves his defense tired. His defense catches all the hell. Accurate in the pocket. Not mobile. Can’t improvise. Tony Kornheiser’s favorite player.
bengalswrs
10. AARON RODGERS
Solid. Helped Green Bay move on from the Favre era. Wasn’t the problem in Green Bay. Offense was 5th best in scoring in 2008. played his best in the 2nd quarter with a 110 passer rating and 12 to 4 TD to interception ratio. A guy you can win with. Accurate deep ball passer.
11. TONY ROMO
High yards per pass average a bit suspect do to playing with deep threat receivers. Plays well against bad defenses. Passer rating tumbles to only 67% once December arrives. Big question mark about his upcoming 2009 season without T.O. opening up the field. Will need to become more of a Quarterback and not just a thrower. Needs to get a post season win to get fans & press off his back.
12. BRETT FAVRE
Assume he will be the starting QB for the Vikings. Old man still better then the hack throwers the Vikings sport today. Could QB the vikings to the SB behind that Offensive line and Run game. Tends to just heave balls up in the air when he is in trouble. Lacks discipline. Won’t need to be the man in Minnesota.
13. JAY CUTLER
New Coach came in and ran him out of town. Very talented. Needs to learn how to win. Hasn’t won since High School. Failed to lead his team to the playoffs at end of 2008 season. Reminds one of Carson Palmer. So far unable to deliver. But that could change in Chicago where he carries chip on shoulder.
14. JAKE DELHOMME
Solid NFL Quarterback. Only 74% passer rating throughout career on 3rd down. That’s not good enough. Elway said key to an NFL QB is ability to move chains. Delhomme struggles to move chains. Especially in the postseason. A good story. Nice guy. Limited upside has held him back.
15. ELI MANNING
Fraud. Terrible thrower. Yards per pass career average is only 6.3. That’s not much better than Mark Malone. Quaterbacks behind the best o-line in the biz. Best running game the NFL has seen since T Davis in Denver. Lucked out in 4th QTR in SB. Had a 40% passer rating in that game through 3 Quarters. If Giants give him big money it will be big mistake. Not a leader. Reminds one of a child. Killed Giants in playoffs last year with wobbly ball.
16. CHAD PENNINGTON
Accurate on short to medium passes. a guy you can win with, Until post season when his limitations begin to creep up. A Leader. Hard worker. Competitive. A guy you can go to war with. Not very talented. Steadied the Dolphins after miserable 2007 campaign.
17. KERRY COLLINS
Good leader. Not great leader. Solid. a game manager. Not explosive. But in day and age of bad QB play in NFL, Collins seems to be a good fit for Titans. Quick release. Doesn’t get sacked much. Happy to throw the ball away. Not mobile.
18. MATT HASSLEBECK
Over rated. Coached up. Very Mechanical. Opposite of a golfer who plays by feel. Throws a lot of passes that ends up not meaning much. Master of the 5 yard out pass. Doesn’t have the talent to win a Superbowl.
19. DAVID GARRARD
Mobile, tough, somewhat accurate. Lost his big offensive line and run game last year in 1st week. Couldn’t carry his team. A Quarterback who will win games with a happy medium of accuracy and mobility. A poor mans Donovan McNabb.
20. MATT SHAUB
Could sky rocket on next years ratings. nice yards per attempt average. If you don’t think yards per attempt is important, consider that Ryan leaf has the all times lowest. Very close to winning. Needs to get off to a good start and get that winning feeling. Talented. Drafted same year manning, rivers and superstar Roethlisberger was taken. Upside.
21. MATT CASSEL
Did surprisingly well in New England. Got big money from Chiefs. But won’t be able to take Moss with him. The field won’t be wide open with his choice of receivers to throw too. People may question the Chiefs giving big money to this guy. Could turn out to be a fraud.
22. TRENT EDWARDS
Front runner. 116% passer rating when ahead in games, drops to only 70% when tied. Throws better down the middle of the field then he does to the outsides. 119% passer on first down, drops to 57% on 2nd down. This once again shows he a front runner. Needs to play with lead.
23. MARC BULGER
Once proud 8 yards per attempt avg, being beaten down to the sixes by terrible offensive line. has taken too many hits. Time is dwindling in St Louis. Shame.
24. JOE FLACCO
Huge Talent. Very cool in pocket. Could become a problem for rival Steelers. Could take next step in year 2. Should make this rating look very bad.
25. BYRON LEFTWICH
Only a 79% passer for his career. Plays well when he isn’t the guy. He wants to be the guy but doesn’t perform when he is. Should win job in Tampa. Jim Wexell wrote last year that Leftwich will be the next Jim Plunket and go on to win multiple Super Bowls. We doubt that very much.
26. KYLE ORTON
Comes over from Chicago to replace talented Jay Cutler. Orton is not talented. Would like to have a ticket for a game in Denver when he fails to deliver. The boo’s will cascade down from high above Invesco field. Would be a great team to cover as a reporter with hot shot coach making dumb choices.
27. JASON CAMPBELL
Average QB at best. Was overwhelmed by Steeler defense on a Monday night at home 1 year ago. Was never the same after that. Just not good enough. Only averaged 5.9 yards per attempt on 3rd down , 1 year ago. Feels hurt that Skins were rumored to have been looking at Cutler. After Cutler signed with Bears, Skins said Campbell is our guy. yea right.
28. DAUNTE CULPEPPER
This could be Matt Cassel 1 year from now. Look at what happens when you don’t have Moss opening up the field for everyone.
29. SHAUN HILL
Rocky Balboa type of player. Heart. plays with passion. Not talented.
30. JAMARCUS RUSSEL
Sux so far.
http://www.postgameheroes.com/?p=6732
By Dutch | June 20, 2009
-NFL QUARTERBACK RANKINGS-
1. BEN ROETHLISBERGER
Everything you would want in a Quarterback. Big, Strong, Mobile, tough, accurate, Poised, great thrower inside and outside the pocket.One man Gang. Tied for 5th all time highest yards per pass avg. Winner. Won first 14 games as a rookie. Most wins through first 5 years. Elevates his play in the playoffs. Operates behind the worst offensive line to have ever won a Superbowl. Great Road player. Carried team on back en route for 2nd Superbowl win in career. 121% 3rd down passer rating last 4 years in playoffs is #1 among all Quarterbacks.
2. TOM BRADY
Poised. Accurate. Plays his best when its us against the world. 3 time SB champ. cheated to win. 1st 3 Superbowl wins should contain 3 asterisks. Now has Moss opening up the field for him. Knee injury looms large.
3. PEYTON MANNING
Perhaps the greatest regular season Quarterback of all time. A fantasy Players dream pick. Will Continue to throw despite being up two scores inside 5 minutes. Loves pouring it on against bad defenses. Struggles against the 3-4 defenses. Media tends to over look his playoff failures. In 8 playoff losses his offense has only averaged 13 points per game. Accurate passer that makes quick decisions. played along side 2 quick speedy receivers inside a dome for nearly entire career.
4. DONOVAN MCNAAB
Only downfall is he plays in Philly where they don’t respect anything. Carries his team with subpar offensive weapons year in and year out. Leads his team deep into the playoffs annually. 2nd best all time in fewest interceptions per pass. Needs a Superbowl win to solidify his greatness.
5. KURT WARNER
One of the all time leaders in Yards per pass average. Winner. Feels more comfortable when he gets to throw the ball 35+ times a game. Has played with amazing receiving corps throughout his career. Decision making over rated by media. His Sack % increased to a morbid 12% with his stint with Giants when he didn’t have the quick speed receivers getting open for him like he had in St Louis and Arizona. Great character guy. Type of guy you meet at a grocery store.
6. PHILLIP RIVERS
Huge year in 2008. Led all Quarterbacks in yards per attempt. Sometimes questionable as a leader. Especially when he begins jawing at other teams fans. But showed leadership skills in 2007 playoffs playing on injury against Pats. Real threat of run game has helped. Has yet to show one man gang ability like Roethlisberger.
7. MATT RYAN
Looks like a man ahead of his time. Helped carry the Falcons to the playoffs in his first year. poised. high yards per attempt for a rookie. Ability to make plays. Will win a Superbowl someday.
8. DREW BREES
led the league in passing Yards. Almost broke Dan Marino’s all time passing yards record in a single season. Struggles on the road. 6 of 8 road games in 2008 he had below a 70% passer rating. perhaps a product of his environment. Throws well in a dome. Likes to throw all the time to take the pressure off of having to complete the passes. Tends to struggle in 4th Quarters. Struggles with winning.
9. CARSON PALMER
Not a Winner. Believes the hype that surrounds him. Bombs away approach results in quick score or quick punt. Either way, it leaves his defense tired. His defense catches all the hell. Accurate in the pocket. Not mobile. Can’t improvise. Tony Kornheiser’s favorite player.
bengalswrs
10. AARON RODGERS
Solid. Helped Green Bay move on from the Favre era. Wasn’t the problem in Green Bay. Offense was 5th best in scoring in 2008. played his best in the 2nd quarter with a 110 passer rating and 12 to 4 TD to interception ratio. A guy you can win with. Accurate deep ball passer.
11. TONY ROMO
High yards per pass average a bit suspect do to playing with deep threat receivers. Plays well against bad defenses. Passer rating tumbles to only 67% once December arrives. Big question mark about his upcoming 2009 season without T.O. opening up the field. Will need to become more of a Quarterback and not just a thrower. Needs to get a post season win to get fans & press off his back.
12. BRETT FAVRE
Assume he will be the starting QB for the Vikings. Old man still better then the hack throwers the Vikings sport today. Could QB the vikings to the SB behind that Offensive line and Run game. Tends to just heave balls up in the air when he is in trouble. Lacks discipline. Won’t need to be the man in Minnesota.
13. JAY CUTLER
New Coach came in and ran him out of town. Very talented. Needs to learn how to win. Hasn’t won since High School. Failed to lead his team to the playoffs at end of 2008 season. Reminds one of Carson Palmer. So far unable to deliver. But that could change in Chicago where he carries chip on shoulder.
14. JAKE DELHOMME
Solid NFL Quarterback. Only 74% passer rating throughout career on 3rd down. That’s not good enough. Elway said key to an NFL QB is ability to move chains. Delhomme struggles to move chains. Especially in the postseason. A good story. Nice guy. Limited upside has held him back.
15. ELI MANNING
Fraud. Terrible thrower. Yards per pass career average is only 6.3. That’s not much better than Mark Malone. Quaterbacks behind the best o-line in the biz. Best running game the NFL has seen since T Davis in Denver. Lucked out in 4th QTR in SB. Had a 40% passer rating in that game through 3 Quarters. If Giants give him big money it will be big mistake. Not a leader. Reminds one of a child. Killed Giants in playoffs last year with wobbly ball.
16. CHAD PENNINGTON
Accurate on short to medium passes. a guy you can win with, Until post season when his limitations begin to creep up. A Leader. Hard worker. Competitive. A guy you can go to war with. Not very talented. Steadied the Dolphins after miserable 2007 campaign.
17. KERRY COLLINS
Good leader. Not great leader. Solid. a game manager. Not explosive. But in day and age of bad QB play in NFL, Collins seems to be a good fit for Titans. Quick release. Doesn’t get sacked much. Happy to throw the ball away. Not mobile.
18. MATT HASSLEBECK
Over rated. Coached up. Very Mechanical. Opposite of a golfer who plays by feel. Throws a lot of passes that ends up not meaning much. Master of the 5 yard out pass. Doesn’t have the talent to win a Superbowl.
19. DAVID GARRARD
Mobile, tough, somewhat accurate. Lost his big offensive line and run game last year in 1st week. Couldn’t carry his team. A Quarterback who will win games with a happy medium of accuracy and mobility. A poor mans Donovan McNabb.
20. MATT SHAUB
Could sky rocket on next years ratings. nice yards per attempt average. If you don’t think yards per attempt is important, consider that Ryan leaf has the all times lowest. Very close to winning. Needs to get off to a good start and get that winning feeling. Talented. Drafted same year manning, rivers and superstar Roethlisberger was taken. Upside.
21. MATT CASSEL
Did surprisingly well in New England. Got big money from Chiefs. But won’t be able to take Moss with him. The field won’t be wide open with his choice of receivers to throw too. People may question the Chiefs giving big money to this guy. Could turn out to be a fraud.
22. TRENT EDWARDS
Front runner. 116% passer rating when ahead in games, drops to only 70% when tied. Throws better down the middle of the field then he does to the outsides. 119% passer on first down, drops to 57% on 2nd down. This once again shows he a front runner. Needs to play with lead.
23. MARC BULGER
Once proud 8 yards per attempt avg, being beaten down to the sixes by terrible offensive line. has taken too many hits. Time is dwindling in St Louis. Shame.
24. JOE FLACCO
Huge Talent. Very cool in pocket. Could become a problem for rival Steelers. Could take next step in year 2. Should make this rating look very bad.
25. BYRON LEFTWICH
Only a 79% passer for his career. Plays well when he isn’t the guy. He wants to be the guy but doesn’t perform when he is. Should win job in Tampa. Jim Wexell wrote last year that Leftwich will be the next Jim Plunket and go on to win multiple Super Bowls. We doubt that very much.
26. KYLE ORTON
Comes over from Chicago to replace talented Jay Cutler. Orton is not talented. Would like to have a ticket for a game in Denver when he fails to deliver. The boo’s will cascade down from high above Invesco field. Would be a great team to cover as a reporter with hot shot coach making dumb choices.
27. JASON CAMPBELL
Average QB at best. Was overwhelmed by Steeler defense on a Monday night at home 1 year ago. Was never the same after that. Just not good enough. Only averaged 5.9 yards per attempt on 3rd down , 1 year ago. Feels hurt that Skins were rumored to have been looking at Cutler. After Cutler signed with Bears, Skins said Campbell is our guy. yea right.
28. DAUNTE CULPEPPER
This could be Matt Cassel 1 year from now. Look at what happens when you don’t have Moss opening up the field for everyone.
29. SHAUN HILL
Rocky Balboa type of player. Heart. plays with passion. Not talented.
30. JAMARCUS RUSSEL
Sux so far.
http://www.postgameheroes.com/?p=6732
- Witchblade
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Re: Postgameheroes Hilarious (but True) QB Rankings
by Witchblade » Tue Jun 23, 2009 8:26 am
Spot on
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.
P. J. O'Rourke (1947 - )
P. J. O'Rourke (1947 - )
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