Colts 26, Stillers 7 ���. Nov. 28, 2005 ����Game
#11�
Stillers-Colts Postgame Analysis and Grades
The
Stillers fought decently throughout most of the first half, but faltered a bit
late in the 2Q and gave up 2 FGs for a 16-7 Indy
halftime lead.� In the 2nd half, led by
Billy Cowhard�s ill-fated decision to start off the
half with an onsides kickoff, the Stillers folded like a tablecloth and were
dominated, en route to a thorough 26-7 assbeating
administered by the Colts.
Grades:
QB:�
Benji returned after the 3-week hiatus, and
was rusty and skittish early on.� He
missed an open Ward on a simple flag on the 1st drive, and was also tentative
in the pocket.� He did get more
comfortable, but also threw 2 critical INTs.� He was picked by Doss on a poor pass on the
run after being flushed to his right.��
This was particularly costly, as it set up Indy for a huge FG as the
half expired.� It was doubly costly,
because there was an acre of wide-open running room that Benji
could have run through for an easy 1D and a step OOB.� Ben also threw a poor INT in the 4Q, on a
lollipop lob to
RB:�
Parker got the start, but Whisenhunt and
Cowher soon went to a grab-bag committee approach, with Bettis and Staley
getting some carries.� None of the backs
shone at all.� The Doughboy had 9 yards
on 6 carries, and Staley had 6 yards off 3 rushes.� Parker ripped off a nice 24-yard run in
garbage time.� Parker had 4 grabs, mostly
on short dumpers.� Haynes did not dress,
which ultimately could hasten his departure as a FA in the offseason.� C.�
FB: Kreider
had the best run of the game (in non-garbage time) for the Stillers, gaining 7 yards
on a quick-hitting plunge.� He didn�t
play all that much and his blocking impact was minimal.� B-.
WR:�
It was a very quiet night for the WR corps.�� Ward had 3 grabs for 28 yards, including a
12-yard TD.� Morgan had 1 grab for 7, and
failed to get OOB on this reception late in the 2Q.�
TE:�
Miller had 4 grabs for 26 yards.�
He was used extensively in the 1H as a blocker, and stood on the
sidelines all too often in the 2H while the Stillers used Morgan and Wilson in
their multiple-receiver sets.� B.�
OL: The O-line had an entirely shoddy
evening.� MaxiPad
Starks was as worthless as a used tampon, getting continually whipped and
abused the entire evening.� Quite
simply, he was absolutely atrocious.� He
allowed Brock to dip inside him for a Parker loss on the first series, and
continued with piss-poor slop thereafter.�
He even got bullrushed by backup DE Josh
Thomas in the 4Q, giving up a sack in pitiful fashion.� But Starks wasn�t alone in the stumblebum
department.� KenDoll
Simmons got tooled quite a bit, plus he committed THREE false starts, including
2 in succession in the 1Q.� He was
manhandled by Corey Simon deep in Stiller territory in the 4Q, forcing a quick dumpoff.� It�s
entirely obvious that this right side of the line has to be overhauled in the
off-season.� Faneca
was totally abused by lowly Montae �Alex� Reagor in the 1Q, resulting in a 3D sack.� If Faneca makes the
Blo Bowl, it will be entirely on reputation.� Marvell Smith was thrown around like a rag
doll by Freeney, before Smitty
succumbed to an ankle injury (or a sore ass; we�re not sure) in the 2Q.� Rookie Trai Essex
fared no better, getting steamrolled in hilarious fashion by Freeney that resulted in a sack that was negated by a Freeney facemask of BenRoth.� He also had 2 false starts.� Hartings had a
costly �low block� while making the stop on Doss�s
INT return, but I won�t fault him for busting his tail and for what is actually
an asinine rule in the rulebook.� (I
understand that the �return team� should be punished for a low block, but the
�defensive� team at that point isn�t blocking; they�re trying to tackle the ballcarrier.)� All in
all, for a team that brags about how vaunted its O-line is, this unit played
like complete and utter dogshit tonight.� D-.�
DL:�
The D-line had an ok evening.�
They bottled James at times, though, at times, they allowed him to pop
through for those key 6-8 yard gashes.�
There was some harassment of Manning, though obviously not nearly
enough.� There was a lot of subbing, plus
the use of some 2-lineman defenses.�
Aaron Smith had a strong all-around game.� This unit was far less responsible for the
loss than most of the others.� B-.�
LB:�
The LB corps, once again, had very, very little impact on this
game.� Foote was slow and feeble on
DB:�
lke
Spec
teams:� Another lousy game by the STs,
which is pretty much a basic staple of Billy Cowher.� Gardocki punted
like vomit.� He had 2 critical
opportunities to pin the Colts deep, but boomed his first punt into the EZ and
launched a 3Q punt into the EZ as well.�
The 1Q punt was critical, as on the very next play, Manning went deep to
OC:�
Ken Cheezenhunt showed us everything we needed
to know about him.� Going against an
entirely malleable defense that Cinci riddled last
week, Cheezen had no game plan whatsoever.� Remember, defense is the weak sister of this
Indy team, yet all The Cheeze Man could muster was 7
points.� This was a classic grab-bag
effort, as the offense had no identity
and no purpose.� It�s as if Cheezenhunt
simply pulled plays out of an empty box of Cheeze-Its.� It�s hard to believe, but true � had this
offense generated more than the paltry 75 total yards in the 1H, the Stillers
may have gone into the locker room with a lead.�
FIVE 3-and-punts in the 1H, which is inexcusable.
The failure to get Randle El involved was bizarre.� Here you have a dangerous receiver and
runner, tailor made for the turf of the RCA Dome, and Cheezen
basically wrote him out of the entire game plan.� Two measley passes
to El, and no use of El as a QB or a ballcarrier on a
reverse.� The 5 false starts, as well as
Ward�s illegal formation penalty, must be at least partially attributed to the
OC, whose preparation was obviously piss poor.�
The QB draw on 4th & 4 -- with a QB just coming back from a knee
scope -- was as clever and imaginative as a toddler doodling with a crayon on a
paper plate.� The lone scoring drive
traveled all of 7 � SEVEN �
yards.� Reviewing the game, you�ll see
there were zero toss sweeps, zero reverses, zero
misdirection plays, and zero influence plays where Indy�s speed
was used against them.� This was a
classic example of an OC smugly going into a game, haughtily thinking his
offense was simply going to pound the ball up the gut for 7 yards chunks on
each and every down, not entirely dissimilar to the gameplan versus NE in last
year�s AFCC.� Very, very
poor.�� F.�
DC:�
LeBeau regrouped after yet another horrendous
opening, score-giveup drive � which was something
like the 8th of the season � and limited the Colts thereafter to just 1 TD and
4 FGs.� Unfortunately,
his tacklers weren�t up to the task of stopping James, and the pressure and
smacking of Manning was all too infrequent.�
Lastly, a huge knock on Dick and DB coach Darren Perry -- how in the
hell does Ike Taylor peek into the backfield on the opening play of the
game??�� If Manning�s PAP work wasn�t
drummed into every defender�s head at least 96 times during the week, then Dick
and Darren failed.�� C+.�
HC:�
Billy Cowher is supposedly the grandmaster of getting his teams fired up
for prime time TV, but on this evening, with a chance to knock off the unbeaten
Colts, they bowed out with barely a whimper.�
The intensity and hitting was marginal, at best.� The defensive tackling was flaccid and
feeble.� The offensive gameplan, which
Bilbo presumably approved, was a stinking pile o� shit.� The plethora of pre-snap penalties showed a
distinct lack of focus and preparation.�
As ABC showed, Cowhard�s team has had the
incredible luxury of playing the least number of games, by far, in domes the
past several seasons, and it showed.� The
decision to conduct the onsides KO to start the 2H was dubious, at best.� Then Cowhard immediately follows up that
riverboat gamble, trailing 23-7, by PUNTING on 4th & 7 at the
Indy 37.� How the hell do you try an
onsides KO, down 16-7, but then on the next series, punt from the opponent�s
37-yard line while the score is 23-7??�
Then there was the excessive grabass on
offense late in the game, in which the Stiller �O� showed no urgency, and on
the last possession, simply plunged the ball on all of its final 5 plays. You�d
think Cowhard would want to get his QB and WR corps
to get some work as well as send a message to the entire offense, since all
they could do was muster 7 piss-ant points.�
Instead, the dimbulbed Cowher was more than
content to do nothing but throw in the white flag of surrender and do what he
does best -- blindly and blandly plunge the football.� Collectively, tonight was just another
example of why Cowhard will never win a championship
in the National Football League.� D-.�
Synopsis:�
If you read my pregame analysis, this beating
unfolded the way I expected it to.� The
playoffs� home field is obviously lost, but all is not lost�not yet.� Sure, it�s embarrassing to get whipped on MNF.� But the Stillers need to learn from the
litany of mistakes, and then quickly forget this whipping and focus on the Cinci Bungals, who come to town
as the division leader this Sunday for a tilt that will likely determine the
division champ.� If they rebound, the
Stillers can move on and wrap up the division title, but should they lose a 3rd
consecutive game, this team will teeter and wobble down the stretch, in danger
of missing the playoffs.�