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Stillers-Bitans Postgame Analysis and Grades

November 18, 2014 by Still Mill


Stillers 27, Bitans 24 ……. Nov 17, 2014…………Game # 11

 

Stillers-Bitans Postgame Analysis and Grades

 

The Stillers went to OpreyLand and jumped out to a 10-0 lead over the hapless 2-7 Bitans.   Sure enough, of course, the Stillers reverted to their oft-favorite combination of slop n’ slather, and before ya knew it, Tenn was whipping ass with a 24-13 lead.   The Stillers clawed back and won in an uninspiring effort, aside from the Full Beast Mode of Leveon Bell.   Due to the late nite game, and the uninspiring effort, I won’t spend much time on this wrap-up.

 

Grades:

QB:  Ben had an ok evening, although the 1H was spotty and shoddy.    Had Bryant WIDE open in the EZ, late 1Q, but lamley lollipopped the ball, which allowed the DB to make up -- literally -- NINE yards and get a paw on the ball to break up the pass.  Thanks to this, and 2 ensuring poor lobs by  Ben, the offense had to settle for 3 when it should have easily gotten a TD.  

In the 2Q, on a 3d & 11, Ben had ALL DAY, and refused to fling the ball, despite having PeePee Archer wide open on a wheel route.    Like an imbecile, Ben just stood there, Dilfer-like, refusing to move in the pocket, and finally, after about 9 seconds, was sacked.   Took another foolish sack just prior to the 2MW, although it lost only 1 yard.   A few plays later, on 3D at the Tenn 17, Ben had a decent amount of time, and then threw this lame-assed, Tomczakian quail to AB in the EZ that was, oh, about 20 feet underthrown for an easy Dong INT by the Tenn DB. 

Ben snapped out of most of his funk in the 2H, with a solid effort.   Still, the 1H was dreadful.      C-

 

RB:  

Bell -  Stutter Bell had a monster game, simply rumbling over the Bitan defense with a 204 yard effort.   Bell went into Beast Mode late in the 3Q, carrying for 7, 27, 11, 2, and 5, with the final 5 for a TD to close the gap to 24-20 (after the PAT).   Then, late in the game and trying to hold onto a 3-point lead, Bell just ground down the Bitans when the entire stadium knew he’d get the ball.   A true Hard Hat effort.     A++  

Blunt – played little and never carried.   Inc

Archer:  Pee Pee Archer was thrown a simple flare pass, and juggled it like a circus clown, causing a 5-yard loss.  He’s just so fast & explosive, though.   Just ask Kevin Doltbert….!      F

 

FB: 

Will Johnson - good block, big gainer of 19 by Bell, opening series.  Had numerous strong blocks in springing Bell in the 2H.    Well done.     A

James Harrison - surprisingly, didn’t play any FB and wasn’t thrown any passes.

 

WR: 

Brownie – 9 grabs, 91 yards, 1 TD.   Very solid effort.     A-

Pinkie Wheaton - clutch grab on 3d & 4, mid 4Q, for the 1st down on a slant.  One grab for 6 yards doesn’t cut it.    C-

Archer:   Nothing.     By the way, he’s just so fast & explosive, and quick, too.   Good thing Doltbert rabidly reached for this smurf in the 3rd round…!  

Lance “Yancey” Moore - 1 grab for 15.    Inc

Bryant - nearly had a TD grab late in the 2Q, but the DB got just a finger on it to mis-direct it at the last second.   Only had 2 grabs for 11.     B-

Heyward-Gay - did nothing.    Thankfully he barely played much. 

Justin Brown – did not dress.   Hooray !!

 

TE:  

Miller - 5 grabs for 71.    Nearly got his QB killed in pass pro in the 2H, but had a pretty solid effort both in blocking and catching.    B

Spaeth - dressed, and wasted oxygen, plus a scare spot on the 45-man game-day dress roster.   Did jack shit all evening long.      C-

 

OL: 

Beacham  -  totally whiffed on a routine run block, first series, causing a no-gain by Bell.     Mostly a complete waste of oxygen and athletic tape.    C

Gilbert -  FatAss Marcus did okay.   Far from great, but wasn’t a total tool.     

Foster - Mostly resembled an oafish clod.   It boggles the mind how this yoyo has fooled an entire coaching staff.     C-

Pouncey –  decent game.   

DeCastro - The Stanford Simpleton blocked DOWN, when Pouncey needed no help, and allowed his man to crash in and sack Ben at 9:20 3Q.    A poor play by a complete mohron.   Did a stellar job on counter pulls in the 2H, leading the way for Bell.     B

 

DL:   

Cam Thomas - I was hoping he’d sit this one out, but no such luck.  

Keisel -  got a rare batted pass, mid 2Q.  Applied pressure on 3D, early 3Q, forcing an inc.  

McCullers - got his first NFL start…and proceeded to do nothing.

McLendon -  did not dress.

Heyward – got rare pressure on 3d & 6, 13:30 4Q.   Other than that, did far, far too little.

Tuitt - the vaunted 2nd rounder  got a goodly amount of snaps….and did next to nothing. 

 

LB: 

Timmons – applied a crushing stop on a cutback run, mid 4Q.   Above-adequate effort.   B

Yancey Shaquier – did not dress. 

Worilds -  Again, I thought Big LaMarr went to the Raidas.  What, praytell, is he still doing with the Stillers ??    Oh wait, that was The Hokie Hooker, Jason Worilds, who once again STOOD AROUND doing nothing the entire evening.   Did nothing the entire game, despise rarely ever, if ever, leaving the field.    D- 

Moats - next to nothing. 

Spence - Poor, half-arsed play on the Bitans’ opening TD.   Feebly timid and slow on a 23-yard throwback WR screen, early 2Q.   Finally made a play, sniffing out a screen mid 2Q, and then had to preen like a jackass after having done NOTHING the previous 20 plays.    Rapidly showing to be a complete waste of oxygen and a spot on the 53-man roster.   D 

Harrison - had some pressures and hits.

Jones - did not dress.  

 

DB

Ike - did not dress.

Pola - did not dress.

Mitchell – weak, half-hearted tackle attempt, on Tenn opening TD.    A pathetic effort.    Nowhere to be found on any big pass play by Tenn.    Sucks elephant balls.     C-

Gay  -  Got a Dong pick-6 on the Bitans’s very first play of the game.   Totally tooled by Nate, of all people, on a deep bomb late in the half, for an 80-yard TD.   Then got thoroughly embarrassed on a simple curl route, 6:00 3Q, allowing huge RAC yardage with a shoddy angle and poor effort.     C

Blake - mediocre game against mediocre passing team.

McCain - see Blake, above.  

Sharko Thomas – did not dress.  

C. Allen -  Queerez once again sat and sat.  

Spec teams:  

Wing – punted only twice, and didn’t embarrass himself.

Suisham - good opening FG of 49.   Surprisingly, he also connected from 23.  

Wheaton - ok job in KO returns.

Archer – Did nothing on STs.  He’s just so fast and explosive, though.   An absolute steal in the 3rd round.   Colbert once again fools the rest of the NFL.  

AB – had a decent punt return, but it was pushed back due to a hold by Moats.

Sloppy, shoddy KO coverage, early 4Q.    Then, about 5 minutes later, the KO coverage again sucked whale turd, allowing Bishop Spankey to return the KO to the Tenn 36. 

 

OC:

3d & 6, opening series, and Haley calls a SIXTH consecutive running play, which was stuffed 4 yards short.   It’s nice to pound the ball, but pounding a square peg into a round hole, with that much yardage needed for the first, is absurd. Haley struggled like a little girl trying to figure out the Tenn blitz the entire 1H.   Luckily, he realized that quick pop passes were an easy tonic in the 2H.   As Steve Young noted in the post-game, ya can’t play fiddle faddle for 2+ quarters and expect to beat the good teams.      C+

 

DC:  

Dick had his weekly luxury, this week getting to face a greenhorned rookie QB (Mettenberger) making his third NFL start and still looking for his first NFL win. 

Dick was gifted a 10-0 lead, but sure enough, Dick quickly allowed Tenn to march 67 yards for a TD.

Dick would have allowed a long TD march, next drive, but a WIDE open McCluster dropped an easy slant pass that should have and would have been an easy TD.   Tenn had to settle for a PAT-like FG. 

Tenn took over at its own 20, late in the 2Q, with only 40 seconds left in the half.   FORTY SECONDS.     What does Dick do….?    Why, he has Mitchell up FIVE yards off the LOS, and Will Allen only TEN yards off.    There is ZERO DEEP HELP, at all, on the play, and Nate Washington hauls in a deep lob with no defender within 15 yards.  You have to be utterly daft and retarded to set up a defense like this, with so little time left in the half.   Of course, that pretty much sums up the Papal Saint of Stupidity, Dick LeBeau, 

In the 3Q, Tenn took over at its own 23, and then marched….and marched….and marched….11 plays, 77 yards, for a TD to go up 24-13.   A tight end with six (6) career receptions, suddenly became Tony Gonzalez on this drive, catching 3 passes, including the TD.  

We can all thank the heavens that the O was able to chew up the remaining clock in the 4Q.   Had they not, it was quite easy to see Dick and his Softee Defense allowing a tying FG, if not a cake-easy go-ahead TD.

Funny how every QB, no matter how inept or incompetent, suddenly looks like Johnny Unitas when getting the chance to feast on Dick and his Softee, No-Brained Defense.

All the blather about what an omnipotent genius Dick is, is nothing more than pure, unadulterated bullshit.    It’s high time for his Holy Papal Deity himself, Saint Dick, to retire and move on to his life’s work.    F

 

HC:  Mike Dumblin barely escaped against lowly 2-7 Tenn with yet another shoddy, sloppy effort.   The game planning and preparation were again subpar.   Then, the vaunted defense enabled rookie Jach Mettencrapper to resemble Danny Marino, shredding the defense for hugs chunks of yards.   The team didn’t look into this game, until deep into the 3Q when down by 11.   Not impressive.   D+

 

Synopsis: Aside from the stellar effort by Stutter Bell, this was an uninspiring effort against a lowly, downtrodden 2-7 Bitans team.   Not impressed, at all.  If I had the slightest bit of confidence in this coaching staff, perhaps the bye week would help to work out the kinks.   Sadly, this staff is daft and imbecilic, so I doubt the bye week will be used for anything productive or useful.   

 

(Still Mill and Stillers.com -- when it comes to the analysis of the Pittsburgh Stillers, no one else comes close….)

Follow Mill on Twitter, at StillMill1

 

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