Steelers-Ravens: My Ass is in the House

Steelers: Ravens�My Ass is in the House

�how it happened

By Swissvale72

Fate, Karma�.the stars, the heavens aligned for this one.

My brother, TonyV15220, who I�ve oft referenced on this worthy website, has been a loyal Steelers season ticket holder since the opening of Three Rivers Stadium in 1970.  This despite being royally screwed with his seat assignment in the transition to Heinz Field.   Short story is this�.at the time, in 1970, Tony and a few dozen others comprised the entire list of Steelers season ticket holders.  He had his choice of location in the new stadium.  Tony consulted his 15-year-old brother, and then decided to choose seats in the South End Zone, Upper Deck�.first fuckin� row, right between the uprights.  Awesome fuckin� seats�40 yard line in, you�re right on top of the play.  From this perch, Tony (along with his little brother) saw the Immaculate Reception,  AFCCGs including the icy field vs. Oakland in �75, saw Jim Harbaugh�s last second Hail Mary, fall finally, agonizingly to the turf, propelling the Steelers to SB XXX, and yes, was in this seat for the Steelers final home game at Three Rivers Stadium.

Tony, by the way, can claim never having taken a piss in TRS, or in Penn State�s Beaver Stadium, despite having been in each venue countless times.

Then, came the move to Heinz (guess this story isn�t so short after all, huh?  Never know the direction one takes with the keyboard), and Tony, a then 31-year season ticket holder, was assigned seats in the next to last sideline section, between the goal line & the end line, about halfway up.  Not bad seats, but 5-year holders were somehow on the 40.  I wrote Dan Rooney on Tony�s behalf.  Mr. Rooney did answer but nothing changed.

Having built a preference for watching at home, on TV, being rightfully pissed about the seats, and, as a Penn State grad and season ticket holder, being quite incensed with the Steelers having to share a home with the ragtag Pitt Panthers (taking umbrage at the naming of Tony Dorsett Drive), Tony�s only been to one game at Heinz.

Meantime, Tony�s two adult kids have claimed Squatter�s Rights on his season tickets.  Tony finds himself wanting to go to next week�s Monday Nighter, and the 37-year season ticket holder is seeking the counsel of his friendly neighborhood scalper (of which there are a few in the Burgh) in order to get his own ass in the house, his daughter and her schlempy fianc�e driving in from Jersey for the game (sorry, James!!).

Tony comes up with great ducats, on the 40�invites our niece�s boyfriend, Ed, to go along.  Ed, apparently a pussy of some magnitude, all of a sudden this week��can�t go.�

How much have the stars aligned??  I was wondering why Tony wasn�t taking his wife to the game.  She goes to Penn State games with him�was their for the Three Rivers finale, and despite saying annoying things to her hubby that drive him upstairs to watch in solitude during Steeler Sundays, generally likes to go.  It turns out that the school where Betsy teaches is holding their Open House on Monday, November 5^th.  Now�who the FUCK does this?? In Pittsburgh, no less!!  Schedule a fuckin� Open House to conflict with a Steeler Monday nighter??  Tony & I have reached the conclusion that the instruction must suck at that school, they want no parents to attend, so they schedule at a time when everyone will look at the inherent conflict, stay the fuck home.  They�d get more attendees if they scheduled on Christmas.  Dads sick of the in-laws, people wanting different snacks�shit like that.  Anyway, Betsy can�t go�work commitment.  Oh, one other tidbit.  Monday, November 5^th happens to be Betsy�s birthday.  Her husband, her husband�s brother, her daughter, her daughter�s fianc�e will be celebrating the Big Day in a Heinz Field Parking lot.

A few years, back, on of my Board members wanted me to attend an event that conflicted with a Steelers Monday Nighter�.Nashua Woman of the Year Award Dinner�.some such happy horseshit.  I would�ve gone, too, had her answers been different.  When queried on my dilemma, and the ending time of the event, she said, �Oh, don�t worry�.it�ll end not more than a few minutes past 9.�  She obviously didn�t� get it�.didn�t know that by 8:55pm, I had to be home, in front of my TV, Steeler jersey on, beer in hand.  Sorry�.didn�t see Woman of the Year.

So�.Monday, Tony e-mails me�would I have any �interest� in attending?  He re-words, stating the obvious, knowing I�m interested, but �can� I get my ass to Pittsburgh.  I hit Expedia!!  I�m gonna take the 6:00am oston Express bus from Nashua, NH to Logan Airport on Monday morning, gonna get my ass on a flight to Pittsburgh by way of LaGuardia�.touching down in Pittsburgh around noon for my 3^rd Heinz Field jihad this year.  Price to pay on the home front?  Hmmm�.I�ve committed to see what I can do about curbing my �addiction,��.committed to not log on quite so much to Stillers.com!!  We�ll see how that works out.

Monday Night�.Hienz will be rocking!!  Throwbacks, 75^th all-time team!! Hated Ravens!!  My ass is in the house!!  I ca say without qualification that no one else that Tony invited would do so much to help his team win.  I�ll be screaming at the top of my lungs every fuckin� time the Ravens break their offensive huddle�until the snap of the ball.  Could be a 6-advil game for me!!  This shit ain�t easy to do.  Maybe, in JPeezy�s absence, I�ll catch the Ravens team bus coming in�.heckle the shit out of �em, challenge Ray Lewis, get my ass kicked, hopefully get in the thug�s head�.maybe he slips on some fuckin� banana peel, or cup of beer while he�s kickin� my ass, and suffers an abdominal strain.  I�d do that for my team!!  My meagher bag is packed�.binoculars, terrible towel�.nothing else!!

It�s Steelers�..Ravens�.Monday Night�.Heinz Field�.My Ass will be in the House�..Yo!! GBall8man�.you gonna be there??