Final 2000 Season Gildong Report

The 2000 Season-in-Review GilDong Report

In light of many a fan being bamboozled and ga-ga over Jason Gildong�s 11 sacks in �98 --- despite only 2 being anywhere near "earned sacks" --- I devoted considerable time last season to monitor the work of the exceptionally average Jason Gildon. Jason has been famous enough with his coverage sacks, flop sacks, the QB-slipped-on-the-wet-turf sacks, the OT totally forgot his blocking assignment sacks, and so on, that the NFL designated a new statistic, called the "Dong Sack™", in honor of Jason Gildong. (Some fantasy football leagues are incorporating this into their point systems.) Again in '00, I took the time to expose Jason Gildon for the fraud that he is.

As faithful readers here can attest to, each week I during the entire season I pored through every inch of tape to review the work of Big Jason Gildon, the fearsome OLB of the Stillers. (Each Gildong Report is available for your perusal, under the "Articles" page, and then under "Still Mill".)

The table below, exclusive to Stillers.com, summarizes each of Gildong's sacks during 2000:

A summary of Big Jason's sacks:

* 8-1/2 -- or 63% -- of his sacks were Dong Sacks.

* Of his 5 Earned Sacks, 2 -- or 40% -- came against lowly Cincinnati, one of the worst teams in the NFL and owner of one of the sorriest offenses in the league.

* 2 other Earned Sacks came against Jacksonville, a team whose offensive line got totally ravaged by injury. On one of those sacks, Big Jason beat Zach Pillar, a guard who was forced into playing RT because the team had no one else to turn to. The other Earned Sack vs. Jax came when Big Jason was totally unblocked at the LOS and was solo blocked by RB Fred Taylor.

* The only quality earned sack came against RT Fred Miller of Tennessee, who tooled Gildon all day, but got lulled by the continual WLR and got beaten when Gildon cut off the loop and veered toward the QB.

* In the 8 games he played against teams who finished with winning records, Big Jason was SHUT OUT in 5 (FIVE) of them. (NYG, both Baltimore games, Oakland, and NY Jets). In the other 3, Gildong had an earned sack & a Dong sack in 2 games vs. Tenn., and a Dong sack vs. Philly that resulted in a 3-inch loss by QB McNab.

* 10 1/2 sacks -- or 78% -- of Big Jason's sacks came against teams who finished at .500 (Washington) or with losing records (Jax, Cinci, Clev, and San Diego). 1-1/2 came against the Deadskins, a team who fired their coach less than 2 weeks prior and a team so disheartened and staggering that it resembled a wino stumbling down Forbes Avenue at 3 AM in a drunken stupor. 2 sacks came againt San Diego, the team who finished with the worst record in all of football, 1-15.

* 3 sacks (22%) -- one earned and two Dongs -- occurred when the ever-fearsome Jason was blocked only by a RB. And in both cases of the Dong Sacks, the RBs (Prentice and George) were overtly forgetful and slow at the snap to mosey over on the pick-up of Big Jason.

* Take a look at what you consider our "biggest games" of the season. And take a look at the games we lost. Then show me what relevance, usefulness, and effect Big Jason had in those games. Only the Earned Sack against RT Fred Miller, in the closing minutes of the first Titan meeting, had any relevance or effect on the game's outcome. And even in that game, a few plays later, Big Jason totally blew the coverage on TE Erron Kinney, who caught the game-winning TD pass with just 1:25 left to play.

* The 2 most humorous Gildong sacks? Versus Wash, Big Jason got a Dong Sack when half the Redskin offense, to include the RT, failed to move when the ball was snapped. He got another half-sack when QB Jeff George badly fooled Gildon with the naked bootleg, but then slipped from the wet turf onto his ass, and Gildon and Simmons came over & dove on for the easy-as-pie sack.

Big Jason was credited with 5 "FF's" (forced fumbles). I've only credited him with four, because the one FF in the Jets game came on a dual hit by GilDong and Flowers, in which Flowers' vicious hit fully appeared to have caused the Martin fumble. Flowers was initially given the FF, but the Stiller PR machine vehemently protested to the league and had it reversed & credited to Big Jason.

1. Game #2, versus Cleve: Butterfingered WR Darren Chiavarini, who had a miserable game that day with 3 dropped passes, was tackled very ordinarily by Big Jason, and just flubbed and coughed up the ball. On a scale of 1-10 in terms of "hardness of hit", this simple tackle by GilDong was a 3.

2 & 3. Game #12, vs. Cinci: Akili Smith twice coughed up the ball, once as he was going down on a Gildon sack in which Smith had a full grip of the ball, but inexplicably just dropped it just before he hit the ground. The other was a nice strip from behind by the loop-rushing Gildon, on a 4th & 21 play with just 50 seconds remaining in a 20-point blowout. Cinci's offense, of course, was so pitiful that only Cleveland generated few points/game in the entire NFL.

4. Gildon came off a WLR & corralled the bootfooted Leaf lumbering from the pocket, and Leaf, as is his nature, lazily allowed the ball to be poked from his hand. This play occurred with just 1:55 remaining at the SD 2-yard line with the Stillers cruising along with a comfy 13-point lead. Again, San Diego finished 1-15, in large part due to a pitiful offensive line that resembled a line of traffic cones.

Or course, pass rushing is not merely collecting slop sacks. Far more important than the 1st quarter slop sack, is the consistent and continual harassment and disruption of the QB, which Big Jason did so little of all season long. Where was GilDong in the Cleveland loss, when Tim Couch was carving up the defense? Where was Big Jason in the Giants loss, when Kery Collins got sore legs from having to stand in the pocket so long on each play? In both games, Big Jason was tittyfighting with the RT and did nothing all day to harass, hurry, or disrupt the QB. Where was Big Jason on the infamous 4th & 8 completion from McNair to Mason late in the second Titan loss? I'll tell you where --- he was getting mauled and manhandled by the RT, that's where.

Bear in mind, of course, that LINEBACKER is also more than collecting slop sacks. Linebackers are SUPPOSED to offer run support, which Jason feebly & infrequently did all year long. I lost track of the number of times Big Jason got totally duped on reverse bootlegs and reverses. Moreover, Jason continually gave up gobs of yardage off-tackle and around end all season long. Who will ever forget the second Jax meeting, in a must-win game on ESPN national prime-time TV, in which Big Jason, after recording a sack on the game's first play, stood around the next 66 plays and haplessly flailed around like a 1-armed windmill, continually giving up gobs of yardage, and big-play TD runs, to RB Fred Taylor? Or how about another must-win game versus the Giants, in which Gildon spent the entire day meekly squatting down on all fours like a downtrodden pumperboy? The way teams continually ran by Big Jason in 2000 was downright shameful and sickening. But hey -- the NFL doesn't keep track of "getting whipped off the snap", or "getting bullied and manhandled by a FB or TE", or "flailing and whiffing at a ballcarrier", or "number of times bamboozled by a bootleg or reverse". The NFL keeps track of sacks, and Big Jason -- who benefits from playing opposite Joey Porter; who benefits from playing against the 18th hardest NFL schedule; who benefits from feasting on weak, lethargic opponents like Diego, Cinci, and Washingtn; and who benefits from being on the field for 99% of all snaps, manages to collect enough slop sacks to fool voters into voting him as a reserve for the pro bowl. What's even more amusing is that 4 other players on his own team had more total tackles than he did -- LBs Holmes & Kirkland (Holmes by an enormous margin, 127-77), and little DBs Flowers and Washington. Even more amusing, FS B. Alexander, who played sparingly behind former starter Scott Shields the first 3 games of the season, finished with 3 more solo stops than Big Jason, and CB Chad Scott had 6 more solos than The Dong.

Jason GilDong -- all fluff and little substance. Looks great on paper, but on the gridiron, he's a paper tiger. Maybe next year he can play for Clemson, the home of paper tigers. Of course, I could care less if GilDong is playing in the XFL, the CFL, or the Japanese Farm League next season, so long as it isn't for the Black n' Gold, who have too proud of a history of great, har-nosed linebacking to be tainted by the softee, gutless play of Jason Gildong.