Call Tebow!
Commentary by PalmerSucks
August 31, 2014
As the memory of 2014’s fake games fades, a few things about the Stillers have become clear. One of them is that the team is in big trouble should something happen to QB Ben Roethlisberger.
Thursday night vs. Carolina, Landry Jones showed just why I absolutely hated the Stillers drafting him. Jones got the start, throwing the ball 18 times and netting a whopping 97 yards passing. Through three quarters, he led the Stillers to exactly zero points, a perfect way to cap off a putrid pre-season.
With so much playing time, Jones was able to display the whole package: the total lack of pocket presence, the inability to read defenses, the limited mobility, and, most of all, the pup-tent-like folding under pressure. As a bonus, he demonstrated the kind of high throws that get receivers killed, like he did with Martavis Bryant (who left the game hurt).
Jones showed no feel for the rush, and no escapability, making him an easy sack. “Mr. Sunshine” (as I like to call him) showed why he’s the anti-Ben. Jones has been so bad in pre-season, in fact, that I’m now proposing something so radical, something I thought I’d never find myself suggesting.
The Stillers ought to give Tim Tebow a call.
Now, as you know from previous commentaries, Tebow’s not my idea of an NFL starting QB. Bringing him in as a back-up, however, is a different story. If you’re going to keep three QBs, as the Stillers like to do, why not make Tebow one of them?
Unlike Jones, Tebow’s demonstrated the ability to handle pressure situations and win games in the NFL. The Stillers could use him in spread-option packages, giving defenses something else to prepare for. Signing Tebow would create instant excitement for a team that frankly has become a little bit boring.
Tebow likely could be had for a bargain. He’s busy working right now for the SEC Network, but insists he still can play quarterback in the NFL. Why not find out if he’d be interested in proving it?
Now, if a guy like me – who’s never been a Tebow fan – is saying the Stillers ought to be exploring this option, what does that say about the QB situation in Pittsburgh? And yeah, I know, “Tebow, what are you smoking?” OK fine, let’s forget about it, because after all, we’ve got the great Bruce Gradkowski on the roster!
Call Tebow. And if he’s not your kind of player, call some other back-up quarterback.
Just tell me we’ll call Landry Jones an ex-Stiller by opening day.
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UPDATE: In a move that can only be described as “assaholic,” the Stillers elected to keep Jones. Why, I have no idea. Once again, they’ve shown an inability to evaluate players and make the right moves. The same thing goes for Justin Brown, who for some reason became the coaches’ pet during spring workouts. Brown showed nothing this pre-season, looked lazy in and out of his cuts, yet the team passed on Moye instead. Brown was another draft pick I hated.
The Stillers also cut Shaq Richardson, who unfortunately has been injured and unavailable to play. I’m thinking they’ll slide him over to the practice squad should he clear waivers. Lord knows they need the CB help.
New nickname for Dan McCullers: “the Engulfer.”