Stillers 38, Iggles 29.... Oct 11, 2020 …………Game # 4
Stillers-Iggles Postgame Analysis and Grades
The Stillers hosted the mediocre, 1-2-1 Philly Iggles, the first game this season with fans, some 5,000, in attendance. The Stiller D struggled like a bitch right from the 1Q, and despite a hefty 17 point lead in the 3Q, any savvy fan knew this game would go down to the wire. That it did, and only for an incredibly brainless decision by Philly to try a 57-yard FG with 3:18 left saved the game for the Stillers.
QB: Benji had an ultra efficient day at the office, going 27 for 34, with 3 TDs and no INTs. Had Eric Ebron not treated the football like a greased watermelon, the stats would have been even a bit better. Perhaps the lone lousy pass was the putrid skinny post pass to Chase in the EZ, late 2Q. A
Conner – Had 15 rushes for 44 yards, a grim, meager 2.9 YPC, which, my friends, doesn’t cut the mustard in the NFL. Take away the 25-yard run he had in the 1H, and the average is even more grisly. Had 3 grabs for 19. C+
Samuels – Pretty much has been written entirely out of the offense. Only saw sparse PT and was never targeted nor handed the pig. Inc.
Snell – Had 7 carries for 19, which also is inadequate. C+
McFarland – Saw his most extensive PT of the season, with 3 rushes for 6, plus being on the field for a handful of other snaps. I’m excited, as this is the best back on the roster.
FB: Watt sat out, due to a ham suffered 2 weeks ago. Trey Edmunds was activated for this game. Saw no snaps at FB, but did line up as a WB in a jumbo formation.
JuJu – good grab near sideline, late 2Q, negated by Dotson being ineligible receiver downfield. Had 4 grabs for 28, a pedestrian 7 yards per grab. If JuJu had dreams of cashing in on some mammoth payday, those dreams are evaporating as each ho-hum week rolls by. B-
Wash - had 3 grabs for 25. B
Dionte - Had his weekly injury in the 1Q and did not return. I figured out what his main problem is…..he keeps running INTO contact ! Somehow, he thinks of himself as Larry Czonka, and is taking far, far more punishment than he needs to. Inc.
Claypool – Meh, Chase had a quiet day. Didn’t do much. Oh, he did score 4 TDs to more or less singlehandedly save a hideous loss from occurring. Had 1 rushing TD and 3 receiving TDs. Got completely jobbed on a different “4th” TD when the bumbling ref crew, which struggled all day, flagged him for OPI on a play where the newly inserted backup CB clumsily slipped and fell. At any rate, Chase Carpool is a baller. Dude can play ! Pile into the Carpool and burn rubber on the drive to the end zone !! A++
RaeRae – Had a nifty end around for 58 yards. Nice run. Also had 3 grabs for 12. B+
McDonald – Had 1 grab for 4. Solid run blocking. B
Ebron – stellar grab of low pass, late 2Q. Had 5 grabs, but had a shitty fumbler, mid 4Q. Then, on the next possession, failed to corral a perfectly thrown pass, which was nearly INT’d. Nor sure if Ebron is now reverting to his lousy habits of the Lions and Colts. Treating the football like a greased watermelon isn’t going to work. D
OL: Overall, the line gave Benji good time in the pocket. However, the run blocking was atrocious. When yer getting far less than 3 yards per carry by your RBs, it’s a sorry state of affairs. (And yes, Rae Rae’s long run will distort how shoddy this crew blocked.) Feiler got bullied on the sack, first series. Okor was flagged for a hold, 1Q. DeeAstro bowed out late in the 1Q with an ab injury; replaced by Dotson. (DeAsstro did not return.) High SG snap by Pouncey botched the timing on a pitchout running play by McFarl, late 2Q. Why is this fellow one of the most inconsistent SG snappers in the entire league?? Side note, he hobbled off late in the game; hopefully it wasn’t serious. Dotson, holding flag on a ground play, which always enrages me. Dot was also flagged on an ineligible man downfield, which appeared to be dubious. C+
Heyward – The $65M Man pretty much did jack shit nothing the entire game. Scam Heyward finished with 2 mouse-quiet solos, and zero assists. For $65M, it’s a complete ripoff. D
Tuitt – another vaunted DE who waddled around the entire 1H doing next to nothing. He perked up a bit in the 2H, and finished with 2 solos and 3 As. C
Alu – Chipped in bit in run stuffing.
Vinnie – good run stuff, -2, first play o’ game. That was his only solo, however, although he was pulled quite a bit in favor of an extra DB. Was also flagged for a ticky tack roughing the passer. B-
Bush – very, very quiet game, with 1 solo the entire game. ONE, from supposedly the fastest LB on the team who never leaves the field. Unacceptable. D
Watt – Got nicked up in the 3Q, but came back. Finished with 3 solos and a ton of pressure applied to the QB. Dude earns every cent he’s paid, and then some. B
Crud Dupree – Crud Dupree WHIFFED on a cake-easy Dong Sack, 3d & 3, allowing Wentz to scoot away and complete the pass. Fuking pussyassed lil' bitch, Crud DuPree. On the long Sanders TD jaunt, that was Crud DuPree, completely UNBLOCKED while stunting to the inside, and literally just wandering TWO INCHES from Sanders as the RB hit the hole, all the while with Crud, who has ZERO football instincts, seeing nothing and doing nothing. (See the replay, at: https://twitter.com/i/status/1315347201967616000) If Crud makes the play there – a play not overly difficult for a starting LB in his FIFTH NFL season -- the Iggles punt, and they might not have ever been in this game. Crud would finish the game with ONE solo. And it took him 57-1/2 minutes to get it, finally beating a STIFF of a LT for a sack. The entire rest of the game? Why, all Big Dud did was titty-jousy and pad-grope with the LT, doing jack shit NOTHING. A complete zero. A complete pilo shit. F
Odeniyi – got in a few plays, had 1 solo. (Heyyyyy, that’s as many as Big Dud Dupree….!)
Lowsmith – saw a fair amount of PT with TJ getting nicked.
Haden – good coverage on bomb, 2d series. Got tooled here and there. Flagged for a hugely ticky-tack PI. Thankfully, he busted up the 3rd down pass to Fulgham to force the 57-yard FG, brainless as that decision was by Philly. C+
Nelson – got whipped on a deep ball, late 1Q, but the pass was overthrown. Shoulda been 6 for the Iggles. Then got picked on numerous times throughout the game. Had a decent INT off a hideous misfire by Wentz. I absolutely despised the way Nelson ALLOWED himself to get mauled and bullied, for some 15 yards, on the long Sanders TD run. Here, all Nelson has to do is DIS-ENGAGE, and help for the RB OOB. Instead, he tried to play the role of Crud DuPree, titty-jousting incessantly with a WR, and getting tied up and unable to help corral the ballcarrier. Weak, and unacceptable. Got a Dong INT on a late, futile Hail Mary deep ball. Don’t let the Dong stats fool you, of course. D+
Hilton – A shoddy day at the office. Missed the tackle near the LOS on the 74-yard TD run by Sanders. Did get a sack, mid 3Q. But most of the 2H, he got hideously picked on by Fulgham, time and time and time again. C-
Edmunds – Stop the presses….Edmunds busted up a pass !! A short slant ! I thought they were going to stop the game and give Edmunds the pigskin as a souvenir. His first busted-up pass in the NFL ! Otherwise, did nothing to stop the Philly passing game. C
Minkah - failed to WRAP Fulgham, 2Q, allowing an extra 7 yards on the 18 yard grab. Is rapidly becoming another Ryan Clark and Mike Mitchell, never to be seen within 17 feet of an aerial football. Why is it that, the more time he spends with Keith Assler, the worse his play gets?? Dude was a BALLHAWK when he arrived from Miami 1 year ago; now he goes weeks without making a single play on an aerial football. No shit, this is deeply concerning. C-
Colquitt – punted only twice. I wasn’t happy with the early, vomity 39-yard effort that was FC at the 14. In that situation, ya want the punt to land around the 8 or the 6, and take a hop and be downed. C
Boswell – 1 for 1 on FGs….mailed a 41 yarder. Also 5 of 5 on PATs. A
Dionte – Had 2 okay punt returns. Will have to relinquish those duties if he can’t stay healthy.
RaeRae – had 2 KO returns.
OC: Randy Sphincter oversaw some solid production, helped immensely, of course, by Chase Carpool’s spectacular day. I despised the opening play, a bubble screen to Rae Rae. Sphnicter had TWO WEEKS to prepare for this game and this play, and the best he could conjure was a bubble screen to the #5 WR ?? I also wasn’t pleased with the preponderance of dive plays on 1st down, almost all of which netted 0 or 1 yard. B+
Keith Assler had the luxury of facing a mediocre offense with a woeful, injury-ravaged Oline, AND missing two of its top WRs in Alshon Jeffrey and DeSean Jackson. Yet, right from the 3rd series of the game, it was readily apparent Doug Pederson and Philly had Assler’s vaunted D entirely figured out, and they were like a runaway freight train that could not be stopped. In fact, after punting in the first 2 series, the Eagles never punted again. The Iggles had their way with Assler, assraping the poor fellow like a hapless prison bitch.
Here's what PHIL did on its final 7 possessions:
End of half, with the Eagles having gotten to the PIT 12 on a 37yard play, but the clock ran out.
The third down inefficiency by Assler reached an ALL TIME high today, as Philly went 10 for 14 on 3rd downs. And these weren’t el-cheapo 3rd downs, such as 3d & inches, or 3d & 1. 3d & 7, 3d & 8, 3d & 12….even
3d & fuking SEVENTEEN, and Keith Assler couldn’t get the fuk off the field. The 1Q 3d & 9, a simple draw play, produced a 74-yard TD jaunt while Assler’s crew was too busy pinning their ears back and trying to pad their stats. On the 3d & 17, Assler, in a fit of abject stupidity, rushes only THREE, and Wentz had ALL day in the pocket. 3d & whatever, and Assler was CONTINAULLY getting ass-raped by Doug Pederson. It was fuking shameful.
The biggest, most brainless decision of the game was made by Pederson, who decided to kick the 57 yard FG with 3:18 remaining. My gawd, an NFL HC, even dumber than Mike Dumblin ! Phiily was 10 of 14 on 3rd downs, and this was a 4th & 5. Rather than trying a low risk FG in a stadium that is a graveyard for long FGs, why not take the alternative of a 70% conversion rate, especially with Assler turning Travis Fulgham into the next Terrell Owens ?? (By the way, Fulgham’s agent has already Tweeted that he wants his contract re-negotiated after this game….wants 4 years, $56M.) All in all, Buttler, who has SEVEN first round picks on his defense, should be embarrassed for the outrageous goatfuk we saw today. Buttler spent the afternoon with 1 thumb in his mouth and the other up his anal orifice, and should be fired by Monday morning. F-
HC: Mike Asslin oversaw a defense that couldn’t stop most 5A high school teams. Why, praytell, isn’t Stoogelin, the almighty coach that he is, supposed to be a defensive expert ?? Why then, is his veteran laden defense, which doesn’t have a single rookie getting any kind of serious PT and fields SEVEN first round draft picks, getting bamboozled and flummoxed by an average offense missing its top 2 WRs ? This was fuking disgrace today, and it all starts at the top. If Wentz can pile on 29 with this rag-tag group of skill players, how many will Balt, or KC, pile on ? 45? 50? 56 ? C
Synopsis: An unimpressive win over yet another mediocre foe. (That’s 4 wins against the dregs of the NFL – NYG, the Doncos, the Texans, and now the Iggles.) Sure, Chase Carpool looks like the real deal. Can he play defense? (He covers KOs quite well. Perhaps he should play both ways.) This vaunted defense showed its true colors, with soft, cheezy play that would have enraged Dwight White. This kind of softee defense is about 2,000 miles away from being anywhere close to champion caliber, and had better tighten up, and quickly. Hell, you could just as well see Landry and OBJ lighting it up next week vs. Cleve. Surely they’ll be frothing at the opportunity.
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