TOP 10 Reasons for Stiller Success �
#10 � Keeping Things Simple
Football players are not the most intelligent folk on the
planet.� Most of these guys have bigger
shoe sizes than their scores on the Wunderlik.� They don�t NEED to be doing trigonometry
problems to figure out their pass defense.�
Waste of time for an offensive lineman to calculate a physics solution
to understand his blocking assignment.�
The Stillers have gone back to basic, solid
football.� There�s no need for a �brainiac� like Brent Alexander to be on the field to �quarterback�
the defense.� Simple minds require simple
solutions.� (a
republican party philosophy).� In
football, it works much better than politics.
#9 --�� Plex
Trap has never been a Plaxico Burress fan.� Drops
too many passes, doesn�t catch balls with his hands. �Somewhere along the line, someone actually
TAUGHT this guy how to use his hands for something other than frying
bacon.� It is with great amazement that
Trap watches Plex pluck balls out of the air like he
was �. A wide receiver!� If it was Bruce Arians who accomplished this impossibility, then he deserves
a raise, and Plex owes him half the $12 million
signing bonus the Ravens will be giving him this offseason.
#8 --�� Zone Blocking
Trap has always been confused as to WHY the Stillers insisted on forcing their offensive linemen to be
assigned �man� and �tiers� to block in their scheme.� Guys like Fat Oliver Ross could NEVER adapt
to that scheme.� Ross was lucky if he
made contact with his �man�, let alone even sniff the
second �tier� of his assignment.� This
season, the Stillers have been content with letting a
guy like Ross, who does not have quick feet, simply throw his fat body out and
maul whatever turns up.� This tactic has
worked to perfection with Vincent, as well, and the running game does almost as
well on the right side, as it does on the left.�
By making zone blocking the primary scheme on the right side of the
line, it makes the few times these linemen pull that much better against the
defense.� Fat Oliver has actually been
able to manhandle a few linemen, a premise that in past seasons would have been
absurd.
#7 --�� Zone Blitzing
Yeah, I know, people can say, �the Stillers have always zone blitzed�.� Nice try.�
The zone blitzing they are doing this season is SO much different�unpredictable,
faster, and sensible.� The type of zone
blitzing being used this year is taking advantage of each players�
best skills, and it is not leaving weaknesses exposed like in the past.� Not having a waste of oxygen like Joggin� Jason Gildong on the
field makes a whale of a difference, too.
#6 --�� Dick LeBeau
You can�t talk about zone blitzing without talking about the
founder and architect of the zone blitz.�
When Trap and Ovie talked to LeBeau at the NFL Combine, we pleaded with him to bring
back the Blitzburgh Defense.� He told us that was the plan.� Boy, did he ever deliver!� Steady Eddie Bouchette
ran a column the other day about whether LeBeau or Whisenhunt was the best coaching hire in the offseason.� No
contest � LeBeau hands down,� Anyone who outgeniuses
Bill Bellichick is Trap�s hero.� Thanks, Dick.
#5 --�� Big Ben Rothelisberger
Wow.� All Trap can say is �WOW�!�
Reports coming out of the draft were that Big Ben had the highest upside
of the top 3 QB�s, Rivers, WoManning,
and Ben.� But THIS much
upside?!!?� WOW.� Big Ben is BIG, Big Ben is accurate, Big Ben
is nimble, and Big Ben has a laser arm.�
But, the most amazing thing about Big Ben is his composure � Terry Bradshaw
took 6 years, at least, to gain this kind of composure.� In the heat of a blitz, Big Ben calmly and
consistently continues to look downfield, undaunted.� He shakes off defensive linemen as if they
were all just �Gildongs�.� He�s not forcing passes, and he is the first
Stiller QB who has deemed it worthwhile to utilize Plaxico�s
height.� In short, Big Ben is everything
Mommy Gun was not, and Stiller fans all over the
country are thankful for it.� Trap must
also give kudos to Mark Whipple, even though for years, William Laird Cowherd thought
that quarterbacks coaches were about as necessary as clothing in a nudist camp.� Another thing that Trap loves about Big Ben
is that he is a poor practice quarterback�Trap will take a gamer any day.
#4 --�� Duce Staley
Trap liked this free agent pickup the day it was
announced.� Many people did not.� Some thought that Duce was washed up.� Others thought that he was an attitude
problem waiting to infect the Stillers locker
room.� Still others thought that he was
an �average� back that could not really be a feature back in the NFL.� How wrong they all were.� Duce has helped in the locker room, as well
as on the field.� His speed and
quickness, combined with his incredible power in a small package, have made him
a terrific feature back.� Trap�s only
consternation is that Whisenhunt, for reasons known
only to his self and Field Goal Bill, has chosen not to highlight Duce�s
outstanding pass-catching abilities out of the backfield.� Mark Trap�s words:� once this is done, the Stiller
offense is ready for the Super Bowl.� Getting
Duce out of the backfield on flare passes against a linebacker is going to be
such a mismatch, all will be left wondering what took
so long.�
#3 --�� Duce Staley
Did Trap already mention this guy?� Oh well, he deserves another slot.� Sorry, but Duce IS the MVP of this team.� Do NOT underestimate what it means to an
offensive line to know that they DON�T have to hold a block for the time it
takes for Dick Cheney to count his Halliburton money, like they had to last
year with Bettis.�
Don�t believe Trap, ask the Titans� offensive linemen, who have publicly
admitted that it frustrated them that it took so long for an aging Eddie George
to hit the hole.� Sure, Fatboy Bettis, all 290 pounds of
him, ran through holes big enough that Trivia could have run through last week,
but the line got its confidence at the beginning of the season, when they didn�t
have to make holes this big.� Also, do
not underestimate the character it takes for a guy to gain all the tough yards
down the field, only to give the ball to the Tubby Tailback to score all the
touchdowns.� Duce is a better man for it,
and so are the Stillers.� Duce is MVP.
#2 --� �Speed,
Speed, Speed
Speed kills.� This
team has been upgraded speed-wise in multiple areas:� corner, free safety, strong safety, running
back, outside linebacker, quarterback.� You
can see what happens when team speed is upgraded � it helps in every area.� The offensive line is blocking better, the
defensive line is rushing better, the secondary is covering better, the offense is clicking better than ever.� You can�t teach speed.� Other teams have to prepare totally different
for this team than they have in years past.�
It also helps that the speed has been upgraded at �impact positions�.� Impact players are what separate the good
teams from the great teams.� With only so
much cap money available to each team, teams must wisely allot enough money to
pay for speed at their impact positions.�
Hopefully, this team can continue this in the upcoming free agent years.
And the #1 Reason the 2004
Less mule stubbornness from Bill
Cowherd
Trap has vilified Field Goal Bill over the past few years,
MAINLY BECAUSE of his stubbornness.�
Never one to admit mistakes, Field Goal Bill continued to pound his head
against the wall for the last couple of seasons.� Who can forget, while watching Brent
Alexander and Pee Showers get beat by a tight end for the seemingly 10th
time for a touchdown, Bill Cowherd state that Brent Alexander is �such a
cerebral player, we need him out there�?�
Apparently Burnt wasn�t smart enough to not let himself
keep getting beat by tight ends.� Who can
also forget that Bill Cowherd stuck with Jerome Bettis
as his feature back while Bettis�s weight went up to
255�268�275�280, and the Bus could not hit the holes?� Who can forget the way Cowherd steadfastedly stuck with Jason Gildong,
even though this very website showed pictures of what people did not want to
admit � pictures shown week after week after week � that
Joggin� Jason was washed up?� Who can forget how the stubborn Cowherd
refused to give DeShea Townsend a shot, even though
Scott and Washington were getting crisper than KFC�s wings, and Townsend was
shutting receivers down every day in practice? �Who can ever forget the way the conservative
Cowherd allowed a once feared defense be turned into a vanilla, wimpy defense
first under Jim Asslett, and then under Tiny Tim
Lewis??� Who can forget Bill�s infamous
country club training camps � the ones where Bettis
practiced about twice before the season started, and most vets were given more
days off than government employees?
Apparently, this website and its loyal followers finally got
through to Cowherd.� No more country club
training camps.� Bill actually made
veterans participate in drills.� No more team
movies in lieu of practice.� No more
lethargic play at linebacker.� Clark Haggans replaced Gildong.� No more slowass
plodders in the secondary.� Polamolu and Hope were named starters right off the bat,
mainly because of speed.� What happened
to �cerebral�?� J� A free agent running back was brought in, to
hell with the Bus�s feelings � Cowherd needed someone to hit the hole, and
fight for yardage, not get engulfed in the backfield.� Cowherd swallowed his pride, and brought back
his old defensive coordinator, the same one he ran out of town some years
ago.� He allowed this defensive guru to
run his own show, and it shows.� No soft
vanilla defense for this team.�
More than any single item, Bill Cowherd�s willingness to
admit his mistakes, and to make the necessary changes, is the NUMBER ONE REASON
why the Stillers are the talk of the NFL.� This writer is willing to give Field Goal Bill
the credit and kudos he deserves for this.�
In fact, Trap may even drop the Field Goal Bill moniker this
season.� Give us a Super Bowl, Bill, and
Trap will drop the �d� off the end of your last name!!!!