Trap�s Top 10 Reasons for a Stiller Victory!
10 � Stillers always play well on MNF. Billy the Cowherd may not be much of a gameplanner, but
he sure can get the troops riled up for Madden Mania. (not Flounder, but John.) Billy will have
the spittle and slather going, as he whips the defense into a frenzy, and has Dickie LeBeau
unleash the hounds on Payton WoManning. Say this for Cowherd, he is a motivator!
9 - LeBeau will indeed unleash the hounds. The Stillers will blitz the living shiit out of
WoManning�a blitzing like he�s never seen before. Look for James Farrior to have a big
game with middle blitzes.
8 - The return of the starters. Having Marvel, Farrior, and Ben back is like having Eva Longoria,
Jennifer Love Hewitt, and Jessica Alba enter your beauty contest. Oh, my!
7 - The Colts� defense is small. They have difficulty against smashmouth football, and their
secondary is short. Power running, and vertical passing should prevail. Heath Miller must
be fully utilized against the 5�9� Bob Sanders.
6 - Indoor field should help Stiller linebackers. Trap wrote about the weakest area of the Stiller
defense a coupla weeks ago. We�re talking linebackers here. They have been a sad lot.
However, the artificial field indoors should help Porter and Farrior flash some speed they
haven�t shown at all this season, and allow them to make plays all over the field. Warning:
don�t get too excited over this development, as it is a mirage caused by the field, not the
talent.
5 - Hines Ward. The Colts� defense have yet to see a receiver of Ward�s caliber all year. They
won�t be used to having a wide receiver lay the wood to their quick linebackers on running
plays. Look for Ward to deck June or Thornton early in the game, and set the tone. Hey,
he�ll catch a few passes along the way, too!
4 - No Mommy Maddox. Enough said.
3 - The return of Big Ben. You simply cannot overestimate the effect that Big Ben will have just
as soon as he is announced as a starter of the PA system. Stiller players will stop vomiting,
and Stiller fans will stop vomiting, as the thoughts of more Maddox Maalox Moments
disappear.
2 - Trap is attending the game. One should never underestimate the power of theTrap. The
Stillers have an over .900 winning percentage when Trap is in the stands. Trap�s buddy,
Dave Trimbur shrewdly acquired ducats for this contest some time ago, and now the upper
Deck level nosebleeders are selling for over $600. Terrible Towels will be aplenty, and some
serious gating will be going on in the lots, where the republican hypocrites in Indiana only
allow tailgating 3 hours before the kickoff. Yoy! Cope will be starting at noon today! Oh,
well, Trap will send pictures from the victory!
1 - Did Trap mention the return of Big Ben? Ben is going to give Ron Meeks� defense fits. Look
for Big Ben to run away from Dwight Freeney pressure on the left, and throw on the run to
the right --- a lot. Ben will make good use of Heath Miller, and Ben�s elusiveness will allow El
or Wilson to take off free for at least one deep pass. Trap has seen good QB�s like Ben
spend a few weeks on the sideline, and actually learn more by watching, and then come out
and conduct an offense like Mariss Jansons conducting the Pittsburgh Symphony.
The line is Pittsburgh + 8 � � trust Still Trap, take the points till the cows come home,
the Stillers won�t need them!