The 2001 Season-in-Review GilDong Report
In light of many a fan being bamboozled and
ga-ga over Jason Gildong's 11 sacks in '98 --- despite only 2 being anywhere
near "earned sacks" --- I've devoted considerable time the past 2
seasons to monitor the work of the exceptionally average Jason Gildon. Gildon,
as you may recall, hoodwinked enough voters in '00 to be voted in to a reserve
spot in the Pro Bowl, and repeated that feat in �01. Jason has been famous
enough with his coverage sacks, flop sacks, the QB-slipped-on-the-wet-turf
sacks, the OT totally forgot his blocking assignment sacks, and so on, that the
NFL designated a new statistic, called the "Dong Sack�", in honor of
Jason Gildong. (Some fantasy football leagues are incorporating this into their
point systems.) Again in '01, I'll take time to expose Jason Gildon for the
fraud that he truly is.
As faithful readers here can attest to, each
week during the entire season I pored through every inch of tape to review the
work of Big Jason Gildon, the fearsome OLB of the Stillers. (Each Gildong
Report is available for your perusal, under the "Articles" page, and
then under "Still Mill".) I feel confident that no fan in America has
studied the tape of The Paper Tiger as I have. Furthermore, because the
Stillers played only 11 unique opponents in 2001, no less that 23 teams�
coaching staff and players watched exactly zero amounts of tape on Big
Jason. That�s right, zero. No one can convince me that any player or
coach from a team NOT on the Stillers schedule has watched a single minute of
gametape of Jason Gildon during the '01 season. Nada. They may have watched a
little ESPN, but certainly not gametape. I�d sooner buy stock in Enron than
believe that St. Louis coach Mike Martz, as busy as he is in his weekly
planning, had any time to watch more than 5 minutes of game film on Jason
Gildon, a player who plays for a team that is not on the Rams� schedule.
Don�t try telling me that Washington tackle Chris Samuels, or any of his
teammates, watched much during weekly film sessions of any players not
scheduled to face the Redskins during this season. I doubt John Gruden and his
offensive linemen spent their scarce spare time watching many tapes of Steeler
games, other than the tape of an upcoming opponent who�d already played the
Stillers. And I highly doubt that Gruden, nor his staff, not any of his
players, attended a Steeler game in-person. The Stillers only played one MNF
game, in which Big Jason had a rather uninspiring effort, to include 1 sack
when McNair took a ridiculous 11-yard drop on a pass play.
The table below, exclusive to Stillers.com,
summarizes each of Jason Gildong's sacks during 2001:
# |
Game |
Opp. |
Game Time |
Down/ Dist. |
Whom beat |
Added Description |
Result |
Jar or strip |
Earned/ Dong |
0 |
1 |
@ Jax |
none |
N/A |
no one |
Faced rookie RT Maurice Williams |
N/A |
none |
---- |
1 |
2 |
@ Buff |
13:00 3Q |
3d & 11 |
no one |
Johnson was flushed to right by Porter, who was lined up at LOLB. Gildon was lined up at LDE, and stunted toward the center. However, Gildon never got further than 2 feet past the line of scrimmage, instead getting bullied by the center. Upon seeing Johnson scramble, Jason ran laterally to his left, and was able to weakly corral a slowly juking Johnson short of the LOS. |
Sack, -4 |
none |
Dong |
-- |
3 |
Cinci |
none |
N/A |
no one |
Faced RT Willie Anderson. |
N/A |
none |
---- |
2 |
4 |
@ KC |
12:35 3Q |
N/A |
RT Willie Jones |
Starting RT Vic Riley got hurt. On very 1st play by Jones, Jason took advantage, cutting inside of Jones while Jones clumsily fell on his face. |
Sack, -3 |
none |
Earned |
-- |
5 |
@ Tampa |
none |
N/A |
no one |
Faced RT Jerry Wunsch |
N/A |
none |
----- |
3 |
6 |
Tenn. |
9:44 4Q |
3d & 15 |
RT Fred Miller |
McNair faded back a full 11 yards and WLR (Wide Loop Rush) got him. |
Sack, -8 |
none |
Dong |
-- |
7 |
Balt. |
none |
N/A |
no one |
RT was Kip Vickers, and then backup RT Sammy Williams played from 2Q, on. |
N/A |
none |
Dong |
4 |
8 |
@ Clev. |
5:38 3Q |
2d & 8 |
no one |
No one touched or blocked 92, who came in from left end and had clear, easy sack. |
Sack, -7 |
none |
Dong |
5 |
8 |
@ Clev. |
4:08 4Q |
2d & 10 |
RT Roger Chanoine |
RT was flat-footed and didn't lay a hand on 92, who looped around him. |
Sack, -5 |
none |
Dong |
6 |
8 |
@ Clev. |
0:38 4Q |
2d & 16 |
RT Roger Chanoine |
Looped around Chanoine for sack. |
Sack, -5 |
yes |
Earned |
7 |
9 |
Jax |
0:34 4Q |
1st & 10 |
RT Maurice Williams |
Looped around clumsy rookie Williams, who barely got fingernails on Gildon |
Sack, -9 |
none |
Dong |
-- |
10 |
@ Tenn. |
none |
N/A |
no one |
Faced RT Fred Miller, 5th round draft pick '96, not re-signed after Rams won Super Bowl |
N/A |
none |
--- |
-- |
11 |
Minn. |
none |
N/A |
no one |
Faced RT Chris Liwienski, 7th round draft pick in '98. |
N/A |
none |
--- |
-- |
12 |
NYJ |
none |
N/A |
no one |
Faced RT Ryan Young, 7th round draft pick in '99. |
N/A |
none |
--- |
8 |
13 |
@ Balt. |
13:15 1Q |
2d & 8 |
RB Moe Williams |
Gildon untouched off LOS, then pushed through RB M. Williams and got sack |
sack, -5 |
none |
Earned |
9 |
14 |
Detroit |
0:48 3Q |
3d & 12 |
no one |
Untouched QB tripped onto his face, Gildon then came over and touched him for the "sack" |
sack, -5 |
none |
Dong |
10 |
14 |
Detroit |
0:54 4Q |
3d & 7 |
no one |
QB flushed from pocket by A. Smith, and Gildon came over from RG area and nabbed him. |
sack, -9 |
none |
Dong |
11 |
15 |
@ Cinci |
8:57 1Q |
1st/goal on 1 |
no one |
Kitna rolled right. RG Mike Goff pulled and drifted too far, and Gildon came up untouched and got sack |
sack, -4 |
none |
Dong |
12 |
15 |
@ Cinci |
8:44 4Q |
4th & 6 |
RT Willie Anderson |
Cut inside RT and got Kitna, but grabbed facemask and luckily wasn't flagged. |
sack, -4 |
none |
Dong |
-- |
16 |
Clev. |
none |
N/A |
no one |
RT was Roger Chanoine, undrafted free agent '98. |
N/A |
none |
--- |
A summary of Big Jason's sacks:
* 9 -- or 75% -- of his sacks were Dong
Sacks.
* Of his 3 Earned Sacks --
�. One came on the very first play after KC
starting RT Vic Riley broke his leg. The backup tackle (Willie Jones) who entered
the game on the spur-of-the-moment hadn�t seen the field since pregame
warm-ups.
�. One came when Jason looped around one of the premier tackles in all of pro football, Roger Chanoine of Cleveland.
�. One came when Jason was solo-blocked only
by backup RB Moe Williams.
* In the 4 games he played against teams that
ended up making the playoffs (Baltimore twice, Jets, and Tampa), who also were
the only opponents that finished above .500, Jason finished with 1 sack,
that on the play in which he was left all alone against smallish backup RB Moe
Williams.
* 11 sacks -- or 92% -- of Big Jason's sacks
came against teams who finished with losing records (Jax, Cinci, Clev,
Tenn., Buffalo, KC, Minn., and Detroit).
* Of the top 3 worst teams in the NFL in terms
of sacks allowed, Detroit finished tied #1 (66 sacks); Jax #2 (63 sacks); and
Cleveland #3 (51 sacks). Jason collected 7 of his 12 sacks against these
sieve-like weaklings.
* 2 sacks -- one versus Jax and one versus
Detroit -- came in the last minute of games with the Steelers well ahead
on the scoreboard.
Bear in mind, of course, that LINEBACKER is
also more than collecting slop sacks. Linebackers are SUPPOSED to offer run
support, which Jason feebly & infrequently did all year long. I lost track
of the number of times Big Jason got totally duped on bootlegs and reverses.
Moreover, Jason continually gave up gobs of yardage off-tackle and around end
all season long. The way teams continually ran by Big Jason in 2001 was
downright shameful and sickening. But hey -- the NFL doesn't keep track of
"getting whipped off the snap", or "getting bullied and
manhandled by a FB or TE", or "flailing and whiffing at a
ballcarrier", or "number of times bamboozled by a bootleg or reverse".
The NFL keeps track of sacks, and Big Jason -- who benefits from playing
opposite Joey Porter; who benefits from playing against lethargic cupcakes like
Detroit, Cinci, Jax, Cleveland, Tennessee, KC, and Buffalo; and who benefits
from being on the field for 99% of all snaps, manages to collect enough slop
sacks to fool voters into voting him to a spot on the pro bowl over several far
more deserving players. What's even more amusing is that 7 other players on his
own team had more total tackles than he did. Gildon, for the record, finished 46th
amongst all AFC linebackers in combined tackles. Putting this into perspective,
consider that there are 16 teams in the AFC, and all but one use the 4-3
defense, so this means there are essentially 49 starting LBs in the conference.
And out of those 49, "Pro Bowler" Jason Gildon finished 46th.
Pathetic.
Some humorous pictures of Jason The Flopper during this 2001 season:
- While QB Brad Johnson rolls to his right,
Jason continues running in the opposite direction, thus enabling the unfettered
Johnson to complete an easy TD pass.
- While ILB Earl Holmes makes a heroic vault
to stop Priest Holmes on this goal-line dive, Jason Gildong (gold arrows) gets
buried onto his back.
- On a draw play by Raven FB Ayanbadejo,
Roadkill Gildon gets his ass tossed back 8 yards. I hadn�t seen anything this
ridiculous -- or this funny -- since the night I watched dwarf-tossing in Las
Vegas a few years back.
- In the PICTURE OF THE YEAR, Big
Jason Gildon gets mauled 7 yards off the ball by TE Shannon Sharpe. Jason then
has a chance to blast RB Moe Williams out of bounds, but instead politely steps
aside -- with both hands raised in the air -- as if to say, "Excuse me,
sir�after you".
Big Jason�s newfound tackling
technique�.squat down, facing away from the direction of the football, on all
fours like a downtrodden pumperboy, and then flail an arm up at the
unsuspecting ballcarrier�.
- Jason�s Flop-and-Flail, as shown on
Bennett�s 36-yard run in overtime in week 15�.
- Jason�s idea of "run support" --
turn his back to the blocking RB and hope for a flag�..
- Jason in the midst of getting mauled 7
yards from the line of scrimmage by backup TE Jake Moreland, resulting in an
easy 14-yard gain��
- Jason at the end of a reverse around his
end. The Flopper has a shot at Quincy Morgan, but flails and flops to
the ground. Don�t laugh -- while sitting on his ass, Jason actually gets credit
for an assist on this 23-yard play�..
- After Aaron Smith bulls his way to the QB,
and with the help of Kimo, sacks Tim Couch in the season finale, Jason happened
by and touched Couch as he was lying on the ground.��� What you see below is Jason repeatedly pointing to the ground,
signaling �I touched him down�, in a pathetic, sickening attempt to steal
a sack from Smith/Kimo and claim it as his own.
Stay tuned. Even during the playoffs, I�ll
compile The GilDong Report 2-3 days after each game.
Season ending totals for Jason, in 16 games:
Earned Sacks: 3
Dong Sacks�: 9
Strips, Jars, fumbles caused: 2