We Bad!! Steeler gear for out-of-towners
By Swissvale72
Well�..three months and change post-epiphany. I still suffer from PEIS (Post-Euphoric Immersion Syndrome).
My family tells me that I�m also chronically delusional. Is anyone else�
Absorbed with the jealousy with which one is viewed as you travel about town in your Steelers jerseys, t-shirts, etc.
Me�.we�re at a local eatery (..not a very high class one). I�m decked out in my #43 jersey. By the way, Mrs. Swiss abhors my wearing these jerseys. Hates the material, hates its transforming effect on me. I lean over the table, whisper to the kids, �Hey�.hey�.do ya think that people in this restaurant are jealous of my jersey?� They look at me, look at each other, roll their eyes, go back to their chicken fingers. Mrs. Swiss nudges me, in a harsh but firm whisper, says, �Dave!! Will you shut the fuck up!!�
I�m at the Y�.on the weight machine, the stationary bike�adorned in my white tank with STEELERS emblazoned in gold across the chest. I know that the guy with the Giants sweats is jealous. The local idiot Pats fans�.with their emblems that resemble Elvis�.they may not be jealous, but they�re pissed! The guy in the Shamokin basketball jersey�..he wishes he was a Steelers fan, probably a Pats convert. All the fat ladies that abound there�they wish their men (if they have any) were Steelers fans. I stand more erect (�.maybe I shouldn�t have said that!), I definitely have a swagger, I�m stronger, other members covet my STEELERS tank.
I�m driving in my car. I see other vehicles with Pats stickers. I pass them up, quickly cut in front of them. I want them to see. The top sticker�with the Steeler logo. The bottom sticker, the new one�..five-time Super Bowl Champion. FIVE�.FIVE�.FIVE�.FIVE
I�m obsessed with the world �five.� I go to the Post Office on Saturday, have to overnight my request for Steelers tickets. The postal agent, in
I lean forward, look into his eyes�.right at �em, say �Got FIVE.�
I turn on my heel, laugh my ass off, walk out.
The jagoff probably tour my envelope to shreds. No tickets for me this year.
I drop my car off at the station for inspection this morning. Idiot Kevin, the boss�s son, asks me about the Pirates. �Y�know, Kevin�I bet I couldn�t name five players on the Pirates.� He says, �I couldn�t name five on the Steelers.� �Yes you could, � said I. �Super Bowl IX, Super Bowl X, Super Bowl XIII, Super Bowl XIV, Super Bowl XL.� Do ya think I�ll have brakes for the drive home??
All of a sudden, being a Steelers fan in
Fuck all these Pats fans!! They�re my neighbors, my friends, my in-laws�.but fuck �em.
FIVE is more than three!! FIVE is more than three!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
PEIS has taken over. I may need inpatient intervention. Better pack my Steelers Johnny!!