Stillers Coaching Grades - 2002
season��
As
with the player grades, no nationally recognized analyst has spent the rigor
and research to study the game tapes as this one has.� Nor have any covered and analyzed this coaching staff to the
extent this one has.�� As such, herewith
are the final grades for the 2002 Stillers coaching staff.� (R='Regular season'; P='Playoffs')
Special
Teams:� Kevin Spencer was
brought in from Indy to replace the fired Jay Hayes.� Spencer didn't oversee the number of abortions that Hayes
presided over, but the special teams were still a far cry from being an asset
as opposed to a liability.�� The
coverage teams were soft and spotty, and the return teams were mostly low in
production.� Throughout the season, the
Stillers rarely got a big play from the spec teams in the form of a blocked
kick or a forced fumble.� It was fitting
that the season ended when a veteran player ran into the kicker -- instead of
diving in front of the ball the way you're supposed to be coached to do
-- and the Titans got a re-try for the game-winning FG.�� R=C-.�
P=D.�
Tight
Ends: There's not a more wasteful, more useless coaching slot in
the entire NFL than the TE coach for the Stillers.� It seems rather possible that any 6th round pick could fall off
the couch each week and snare 1 pass per game, culminating in a 17-catch
season. Yeah, yeah, the blocking was good. I'm trying to recall the last team
that won the Super Bowl primarily because, and only because, their TE was such
a good blocker.� The Stillers having a
TE coach is about as useful and important as NASA employing a donkey trainer to
man a space shuttle flight.� R=C.��� P=C.�
WR:� Kenny Jackson had an adequate season.� Plex Burress still displayed some poor
habits, but relative to his preceding 2 seasons, he showed improvement.�� Randle El, who'd played almost exclusively
as a QB in college, developed as a WR rather nicely.� Ward continued his stellar play.�� In all, Jackson did a pretty solid job.� R=A.��
P=B.����
OL: Former
Hog Russ Grimm completed his 2nd season in Pgh and did another good job.� He helped rookie guard Kendall Simmons
develop, as well as 2nd-year linemen Chukki Okobi and Keydrick Vincent.� If Wayne Gandy departs as a UFA, Grimm will
have his toughest task since joining the Stillers.� R=A.�� P=B.�
RB: Dick Hoak
has been here nearly forever, and he's the one coach whom I've always
had the highest regard. The guy has continually gotten good play from
non-spectacular RBs, ever since Franco moved on. Aside from Hawthorne and
Abercrombie, both of whom were soft, pathetic excuses for football players,
Hoak has goaded superb results from the likes of Pollard, Earnest Jackson
(given up for dead by the Chargers), Merril Hoge, Barry Foster, LeRoy Thomson,
BamBam, Pegramm, and Bettis.� Amoz had a
good season in '02 and Fu, when healthy, chipped in with good results.� Hoak is a primary reason why I've never been
giddy about retaining The Tubby Tailback, Jerome Bettis, because if there's one
thing this team has consistently been able to do, and do well, under Hoak's
tutelage and guidance, it�s develop running backs.� R=A.� P=A-.�
QB: Tom
Clements finished his 2nd season in Pgh and did another decent job.� His work with Maddox -- a QB who'd not
gotten meaningful, regular work in years -- was very impressive.� Clements will have a lot of work to do this
summer, as the Stillers will hopefully retain Batch as the #2, as well as draft
a youngster for the future.� Clements
will need to tutor Batch (if retained) to be able to step in for Maddox, as
well as groom the rookie youngster.�
R=A.�� P=B+.��
Off.
Coord:� Mularkey also
finished his 2nd season as the OC.� The
Stiller offense reached new heights in passing prowess and productivity.� And, unlike past seasons, the offense had
the wherewithal, ability, and confidence to overcome a deficit.� Mularkey sometimes resorted to the trick
plays in too much of a grab bag manner, but overall one had to be pleased with
the offense.� If the offense again does
well in 2003, it will most likely be the last season for Mularkey in Pgh, as
some other team will probably offer him a head coaching job.� R=A.��
P=B+.�
DL: John
Mitchell did a sound job with the D-line.�
Casey Hampton not only avoided the soph jinx, but also improved over his
rookie season.� Fellow 2nd-year man Rod
Bailey also developed some.� Like some
of his coaching mates, Mitch has perhaps his toughest job this summer.� Kimo might be cut for sal cap reasons, and
even if Kimo is retained, clearly this team needs to develop another
D-lineman.� R=A.�� P=B.�
LB: As I've
stated in the past, Mike Archer has one of the easiest jobs in the country ---
right behind the guy who serves as the taste tester at the Jack Daniels
distillery -- as the LB coach in the 3-4 defense. The entire defense is built
around making his 4 LBs look like golden boys.�
Archer did a good job of getting Farrior assimilated into his role as an
ILB in the 3-4.� Archer also got good
use out of do-it-all LB Joey Porter, and 3rd-year LB Clark Haggans was finally
put to good use after 2 seasons of bench rot.�
Of course, you have to wonder exactly what goes thru Archie's mind
during film review with his linebackers, when Jason Gildong is continually
bullied by a FB or TE and allows a massive hole for the RB to saunter thru, or
Gildong is once again bamboozled on a reverse or a bootleg.� One other sour note is the total lack of any
big plays by the LB corps in the playoffs.�
Archer recently bid adieu, taking a DC job in the college ranks, and
will be replaced by former Seahawk LB Keith Butler.� R=A.� P=B.��
DB: Willy
Robinson worked his 3rd year as the DB coach, and the results were downright
horrible.� His secondary got scorched in
the season opener, then again in game 2 vs. Oak, and never improved over the
course of the season.� Sure, the
secondary looked adequate at times, but that was when facing the pathetic
offensive likes of Houston, Carolina, and Tampa (with Shaun King at QB).� In the playoffs, the secondary was so
atrocious that is was downright embarrassing.�
Robinson might not have the greatest collection of talent in the DB
corps, but many teams have gotten far better effectiveness from their secondary
with a whole lot less.� It's pretty bad
when you're a DB coach and there's a robot continually yelping out,
"Danger, Danger, Will Robinson!!"��
R=C-.�� P=D-.�
Def:
Coord: Tim Lewis entered his 3rd season as the DC of a
veteran-laden, experienced defense that returned 10 starters, with the only new
starter being veteran free agent LB James Farrior.� This, like Archer's job, was as enviable as serving as a talent
evaluator for a Las Vegas strip club.��
Nonetheless, Tiny Tim struggled as badly as� the 1-legged man in the asskicking contest.� The defense foundered, stunk, and sputtered
whenever they faced anything better than putrid opposition.� In the playoffs, Tiny Tim's defense was
absolutely wretched.� And, it's not like
Lewis was facing an offense on par with the 1980 Chargers or 1984 Dolphins.� The Browns had a mediocre offense with a
very sporadic running game, yet they marched up and down the field so much that
they wore out the soles of their cleats.�
The Titans were missing their best WR (Dyson), and their leading RB was
injured on the 1st play of the 2nd half, but the Titans marched down the field
with all the ease of a skeleton drill.��
While the rest of the Pgh media was fawning all over Tiny Tim last year,
I was all over this sorry SOB, and gave him a well-deserved D+ for his playoff
grade.� Suddenly, more people are taking
notice that Tiny Tim isn't even 10% as smart and brilliant as he was previously
made out to be.� R=C-.� P=D-.�
Head
Coach: After the horrible loss to NE in last year's playoffs,
Cowher went and basically begged Rooney to bring back certain players and
"go for it all" with signing bonuses, etc.� Rooney obliged, going so far as to throw all common sense and
business sense out the window by lavishing Jason GilDong with a huge contract before
the FA period even began.� Cowher got
his team back intact, plus the addition of vets Farrior, Batch, and Mathis, and
highly touted rookies Kendall Simmons and Randle El.� Despite this roster being far and away better and deeper
than the '01 version, Cowher somehow saw fit to lower the wins from 13 to
10.� Much of the decline began back at camp
in Latrobe, when Cowshit ran a country club that did nothing to prepare the
team for the early season rigors of NE and Oakland -- 2 foes who went out and
blistered the asscheeks of Cowher's team so badly that the players could not
sit for film study any longer than 8 minutes at a time.� As is his norm, his team flat out stunk on
opening day, and in a disorganized funk got thoroughly whipped and embarrassed
versus NE, a trend that has happened every season-opener since 1993,
except for the easy laugher over the junior-varsity expansion team of Cleveland
back in '99.�� The low point of the reg
season came when Cowher did his nearly-perennial bumbling against an expansion
team, and lost in horrific fashion to lowly Houston -- at HOME, no less.� In the playoffs, Cowher -- playing at HOME
against a weakling Clev team -- managed to eek out a nail biting, overly
fortuitous win over the lowly Browns.�
The following week, facing an injury riddled Titan team, Cowher's
defense was thoroughly unable to stop anybody from doing anything.� The height of Cowher stupidity was seen near
the end of regulation in this game.� The
Stillers called a timeout with 0:08 remaining in regulation, with the ball on
their 40 and 4th down & 1.� The
Titans -- out of TO�s -- have 2, and only 2, choices:� either throw the Hail Mary to the EZ, or get
a quick completion at the sideline and get OOB
before the clock expires.� Armed with
the time allotted during a timeout, this is what your genius head coach, Billy
Cowher, came up with:
�
� This play was doomed before it began.� The RB, Holcomb, is set right behind the
tackle, while Haggans is in the middle, aligned with the center.� Billy Cowher, being as bright as he is, dug
a moat to protect the middle of the field and gave the Titans a free opportunity
to get easy yardage and, more importantly, get OOB to stop the clock.� It didn�t matter if Haggans, Joey Porter,
Ray Lewis, or Brian Urlacher had coverage -- with this alignment, the LB is
screwed before the ball is snapped.�
Holcomb snagged the out pass and gained an easy 10 yards and easily got
OOB, setting up a very makeable 48-yard FG.�
Nedney�s hooked miss made this gaffe a distant memory, but it shouldn�t
be forgotten.� As I�ve stated time and
time again: No NFL
coach gets less out of a timeout than Billy Cowher.� Dan Rooney pays Cowher $3,000,000 per year,
and in return, receives about $30,000 worth of coaching.�� Lest we forget, Cowher was also the genius
that rushed an injured Kendrell Bell into the starting lineup for the season
opener, and the Stillers paid a king's ransom of a price with Bell hobbled
throughout the season and then in the playoff loss to Tenn.� And even though 2nd-year man Chuck Okobi had
filled in admirably at center, Jeff Hartings was madly rushed back into the
starting lineup by Cowshit, and the results were an unequivocal disaster.� Hartings stunk like owl manure upon his
return, and worse, he was hobbled the remainder of the season.� It's readily apparent that, in the playoffs,
Cowher does absolutely nothing -- unlike a John Gruden or a Bill Parcells -- to
make the difference in his team's chances of winning the ballgame.� It's also readily apparent that this team
will never win a Super Bowl under the dim-bulbed, stone-stupid management of
Billy Cowher.� The road to perdition in
the playoffs starts -- and ends -- with Billy Cowher.� R=C.� P=D-.
(Still Mill and Stillers.com -- the only nationally read coverage on the Pittsburgh Stillers that has accurately predicted the how's and the why's of the past 3 Stiller playoff losses�.)