Ravens 26, Stillers 23…..Oct 6, 2019………Game # 5
Stillers-PoeBirds Postgame Analysis and Grades
The Stillers again slopped around, leaving loads of points off the board after numerous gratuitous Raven give-aways, similar to the loss to SF. The Stillers actually had a late 4Q lead -- twice! -- but true to the so-called leadership of their vaunted head coach, they wilted and folded late in the 4Q, allowing the Ravens two rather cake-easy tying FG drives.
QB: Rudy made a few plays, but also pissed away some golden chances in the EZ in the 2Q by airmailing the ball some 34 feet BEYOND the end of the end zone. Sure, ya don’t want to throw a foolish INT, but at the same time, give your fuking WRs a CHANCE to make a play on the ball, or perhaps draw a DPI flag. He then got lit up by Earl Thomas on a nifty scramble and pass paly that gained 26 yards. Rudy was knocked out cold and had to depart the game. C+
Delvin Hodges came in stone cold and acquitted himself quite well. Looked crisp, going 7 of 9, and looked like he belonged. Nice effort by the young lad. My only gripe was his feeble, ass-awkward dive at the fumbled ball in OT. ALL he had to do was bat the ball OOB. Ergo, he needed to be on the INSIDE of the ball so that he could swat it OOB. Instead, he clumsily dove to the OUTSIDE of the ball, and at that, he was like 7 feet from the pigskin. I’m not going to ruin his grade here; just wanted to point it out. A
Conner – decent game, with 14 carries for 55 yards against a D that wasn’t terribly afraid of the passing attack. Had several solid runs. B
Samuels - only ran the ball twice. His worst play was the early Wildcat pass attempt, a lollipopped FLOATER that was about 9 feet over Wash’s head and was INT. It looked like he hadn’t thrown a football since the 4th grade, even though he has. Just a fuking putrid attempt at passing a pigskin. C-
Snell - no PT.
Nix sat out with the knee. Alualu played at FB on the short Conner TD plunge.
Switzer – Didn’t see much PT, if any, and had no grabs.
JuJu – was having a decent game, with 6 grabs and a nice TD RAC. Then, in OT, he couged up the ball like a little bitch, and worse, aws nowhere to be found as the loose pig skittered around the field for a good 5 seconds. Very piss poor. Perhaps he should spend more time honing his craft and less time playing grabass on social media and video-gaming. D-
Wash - finally started to look useable, with 3 grabs for 52. Then, like a pansie, he somehow got hurt in the 2H and never returned. I don’t have time for gutless pussies. C-
D. Johnson - had 5 grabs for only 27 yards, which isn’t anywhere good enough for a #2 WR.
Holton - no grabs, as usual. Worse, he was given the chance to run the ball on a trick play reverse. With TWO blockers in front of him, he AVOIDS the OPEN ACRAGE and instead fuking runs RIGHT AT the ONE, LONE defender in the area. Muther fuk, if I didn't know any better, I'd say he was trying to THROW the fuking game. F
Moncrief - Clang!! Thankfully, Mr. Skillet Hands was inactive.
McDonald - had 3 grab for 34 before. Amazingly, he completed the entire game without injury.
Vannett - targeted just once, which was busted up.
OL: Overall, the line played half decent. Fat Ramon Foster led the way in the stink department, getting mauled and allowing a sack, and then getting flagged on a SCREEN play in which yer supposed to let the defender beat you. Feiler was his usual mediocre self. B-
Heyward – had a decent game. Not great, of course.
Tuitt – Piled up a bunch of slop stats for the scoresheet. But he stupidly hit the QB some 6 feet OOB in the 1Q, enabling the PoeBirds to score a TD a few plays later. A jackassed play by a complete jackass. B
Hargrave - Chipped in some, and even had a legit sack, but too often the line got gouged by simple dive plays. B-
Alu and McSwallers - did very little. C-
Vinnie – had a pretty solid game, with 4 solos and 5 As. B
Barron - flagged for yet another downfield holding flag, which seems like his 9th of the season. Thankfully got injured and did not return. C-
Bush - had 5 solos and made some plays. HE foolishly jumped on a 3d & long 5, and was flagged, but made up for it a few plays later with an athletic INT some 35 yards down the field. B
Chickillo - thankfully was deactivated for this game.
Watt – Had a decent game, making some stops in the run game. He enraged me when he had Jackson dead to rights, and then got stiff-armed into the dirt like a flailing toddler. If he makes the fuking play, then Tuitt doesn’t get flagged for a late hit OOB some 2 seconds later. C+
Crud Dupree – Mostly did nothing, with 4 slop- solos.
Matakevich - saw a lot of PT once Barron went down, and played better than Barron.
Odeniyi - was flagged for a completely bullshit roughing the passer call in the 4Q. Complete, fuking, bullshit.
Haden – a so-so game. Was soft in coverage at time, and allowed the TD to Brown in the 2Q. C
Nelson - played ok. B
Davis - On IR (thankfully) for another 4 weeks.
Hilton – had a big INT, and made some other tackles. Dude has a nose for the ball. B
Edmunds - wasn’t tooled as often as he usually is, but then again, didn’t bust up any passes. C
Minkah - had some struggles in the tackling dept. Played ok. B-
Kam Kelly - got a Dong INT when a ball ricocheted in the air some 25 feet.
Jordan Berry – punted okay. Actually got a pooch punt downed on the 1. Usually he booms those deep into the EZ. B+
Boswell - 3 for 3 on FGs. Not bad.
Holton: Takes the opening KO at the GL, and tip-toes like he's carrying a 95-pound sack of potatoes, and gets mauled at the TEN yard line. Piece…..of…..shit. F
On the next KO, Switzer had a decent return to the 26, but wait, a holding flag forced the drive to start from the 12. This is how you piss away ballgames, but pissing away field position.
OC: Randy Sphincter had an ok game, given that he began the game with a greenhorned #2 QB and then had to go the last 25-some minutes with an even greener #3 rookie QB. The Wildcat INT by Samuel enraged me, as it appeared Samuel had never practiced passing the ball under ANY kind of pressure or harassment. C+
Keith Assler once had his ass handed back to him. Once again, Assler couldn’t get the fuk off the field on key 3rd downs, and once again, his vaunted defense folded like a lawn chair late in the 4Q, TWICE, while holding a lead.
I fuking despised the 3Q drive after the young Hodges marched the team for a 10-play TD march to make the score 20-17. The fans were all fired up, and the team seemed to have momentum. Sure as shit, Assler gets caught with his thumb up his ass, as the Birds marched 77 yards in 12 plays to set up a chippie FG. Hodges again guides the team for a FG drive, only for ButtFuk Buttler to get GOUGED on a 9-play, 30 yard march to set up the tying FG with 10 seconds left. He sux, and sux ass badly. F
HC: Mike Asslin oversaw another slopfest, with moronic penalties; shoddy-assed ST play, and a softee defense incapable of, at home, holding a fuking lead. The game was there for the taking, and Asslin’s team choked and lost. Now with Rudy injured, Asslin has yet ANOTHER built-in excuse to mask his coaching incompetency. D-
Synopsis: Now 1-4 and going nowhere fast. Sure, the division sucks, but this was a home game that was there for the taking. They now have to go out to LA, a city where they’ve rarely had success.
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