Stillers 28, PoeBirds 24 ..... Nov 1, 2020 …………Game # 7
Stillers-Ratbirds Postgame Analysis and Grades
The 6-0 Stillers mosied down to Balt to face the hated 1-loss Poebirds. Aside from an early pick-6, both the Stiller D and O had an absolutely wretched 1st half, with Balt having a near-commanding 17-7 lead and dominating TOP. The Stillers awoke from their funk in the 3Q, aided by the Alex Highsmith INT, and the Stillers stormed back. Balt had a chance to win the game on the final play, but Fitzhue finally made his firt play of the game and busted up the pass to seal the win.
QB: Benji had as rotten a 1H as a QB can have, spraying the ball wide, too long, too low, and so forth. He also had a pass batted by a D-lineman, which is, oh, about the 23rd this season. He came alive in the 2H, and led the O to 3 TDs. I fuking despised Ben’s wasting a TO on 1st & goal at the 1 in the 3Q. Sure, he was trying to rush up to the LOS, but when the refs correctly wouldn’t let the O snap the ball because of a substitution, you simply have to get a playcall issued and the snap off. Completely fuking BRAINLESS. 1H: F 2H: B+
Conner – had 15 rushes for 47 yards. He continually drew my ire in this game with his cutesy east-west running, almost all of which caused either negative or no yardage. At this level, there are plays in which a 225 lb. power back has simply got to go north-south and take the 2 yards.
Samuels – dropped short crosser, 2Q. Sat too still on a curl route, 3Q, in which he should have come back for the ball. He didn’t, and the LB was able to bust up the pass. C-
Snell – got no work at’all. Inc
McFarland – Sat and rotted the entire 1H. At 3:33 PM, he finally was inserted and got a handoff, and then tripped over his own 2 feet for a 1-yard gain that should have gained 4 or more. He then returned to the pine and never saw the field again on O. A brilliant (sic) use of the fastest RB on the roster.
FB: Watt was active, but I don’t recall seeing him at FB the entire game.
JuJu – JuJu Schitt-Schuster was quiet the entire 1H, with zero grabs. In the 3Q, he finally grabs a pass....and then runs OUT OF BOUNDS like a complete pussy. To his credit, he manned up later, and grinded for extra yardage to set up 1st & goal at the 1. Good effort on a 3d & 1 foot, next drive, to move the chains. Finished with 7 grabs for 67. A-
Wash - drew a PI flag on a deep lob, 1Q. Did nothing else the entire game, rolling a donut with 0 grabs.
Dionte - Got nicked up (surprise!) in the 1Q Came back, and had 1 grab for 6. C
Claypool – Drew my ire by getting stripped of the ball in the 1Q. Had 5 grabs for 42, including the GW TD. B-
RayRay – clutch 3rd down grab, 4Q, and also drew a masking flag. A
McDonald – Not targeted. Blocked solidly. B
Ebron – Had a clumsy drop of a low pass, 1Q. Scored a TD, early 3Q, off a blown coverage in which no defender was within 9 yards of him. Stellar grab, next series. Had 4 grabs for 48. A-
OL: Overall, the line gave Ben decent time. The run blocking was mediocre, although the ground game was pretty much thrown out the window in the 2H. There was only 1 flag, a False start by David DeeAstro.
Heyward – The $65M Man had yet another underwhelming game in which he did very, very little. Scam Heyward committed the hit OOB, not Minkah, to prolong the drive that soon scored the first Balt TD. It was a 3d & 7, in which the QB had basically given up on the play some SIX yards from the 1st down market, and was COMPLETELY WRAPPED UP by Shitzpatrick just 2 inches from the sideline. Sure, Scam’s hit was in bounds, but it occurred on the Balt sideline, and there’s a 95% probability the flag will be thrown in that situation. For a supposed “team leader”, it was as jackassed a play as can be made. Scam finished with a platry 4 solos and 1 A as Balt continually jammed the ball down his throat. Rather sad when The $65M man has his biggest play of the game when he faked injury late in the 4Q, allowing the D plenty of rest. D-
Tuitt – Unlike Scam, Tuitt mostly earned his fatty salary today. Had a TFL, 2d series. Then nailed Jackson for a sack, late 1Q. Hit the QB and forced an INC pass, late 4Q. Had 8 solos. His grade would be higher, but when the other team runs for over 260 yards, DEs don’t get a high grade. And, it was Tuitt who WHIFFED on Jackson near the sideline, which led to the personal foul flag on Scam Heyward in the 1Q. B-
Alu – got injured in the 1H and did not return.
Buggs – swam around C and harassed QB, 3Q. Got a sack, last play of 3Q. Then, late in the 4Q, Buggsy made stops on 2 consecutive plays deep in PIT territory. First, on a 3rd down, he nabbed Jackson to force a 4th & 3. On 4th down, he READ the play, DISENGAGED from the block – things that Crud DuPree is ummune to – and nabbed Jackson well short of the sticks. If Buggsy doesn’t make that play, Jackson easily gets the 1D and perhaps gets a TD as well. B+
Mondeaux – drew a holding flag that negated a 20-yard TD run by Jackson.
Vinnie – solid coverage, but beaten for the short TD pass that tied the game, 1Q. Of course, he was covering a WR, Boykin, which makes no sense. Had just TWO solos all game, which isn’t nearly enough for a ILB and a main reason why Balt jammed the ball down our throat the entire game. D
Watt – Nailed Jackson on a QB keeper on 3d & 8, 3Q, to force a punt. Got a hand on the QB to force an inc pass, 2nd to last play of game. Had 3 solos and 2 As, along with 5 QB hits, while drawing a ton of attention from the Balt blocking scheme. B
Crud Dupree – got a strip of Jackson; created turnover deep in PIT territory, 1Q. Then things went sour for Crud the rest of the game.
1st & 10 at BAL 48 (2:15 - 1st) (Shotgun) G.Edwards left tackle to PIT 46 for 6 yards (R.Spillane). That was CRUD DuPree getting shoved WAAAY to the outside on this routine play off tackle. When you play SOFT on an off-tackle running play, the result is a cake-easy 6 yards.
Badly fooled – just as I predicted on Twitter would occur -- on a QB keeper, 2Q, good for 14 yards. Then bamboozled again on the same playcall, late 1H, allowing an easy 4 yards.
I also despised how Crud played on the 4Q 3-yard TD pass to Brown. On this play, Crud was lined up at LOLB, and the Ravens ran a bootleg to their right. Crud was SOLO blocked by a RB, Edwards, a man whom Crud outweighs by 35 pounds and whom Crud is taller than by 3 inches. Nevertheless, instead of destroying the RB, or whipping his ass with a swim move – you know, like a supposed “All Pro LB” would do” -- Crud just stood there, playing PATTYCAKES with the RB, never once trying to ADVANCE past the fellow and, ya know, HARASSING the QB. Unfetterred and unrushed, Jackson was able to EASILUY fire a strike to Brown for the TD.
Had 4 solos and 0 As. C-
Odeniyi – got no PT at LB.
Lowsmith – INT, early 2H. In just 7 games, he’s already tied Crud DuPree, who is in his SIXTH season, for career INTs. Wasn’t credit for any solos or As. B+
Spillane – pick 6, first series !! Good bust-up on 3rd & 5, early 3Q, to force a punt. Slashed in for 2 yard loss, 2nd play of 4Q. Finished with 10 solos and 1 As, which isn’t shabby. Mind you, he was beaten on a long pass play, 1Q, and had some flails and misses in the ground game. B
Haden – Had 6 solos. Wasn’t abused in coverage. B
Nelson – Had 4 solos amid a quiet day, which for a CB is a good thing to have. B
Hilton – Did not play, and his absence was def felt.
Edmunds – The starting STRONG SAFETY played all 76 snaps on D and finished with, hodl your laughter, TWO solos. Didn’t do shit the entire game. Was nowhere to be found in pass coverage, ever, and obviously he did nothing to help stop the run. Just wretchedly fuking awful. F
Minkah - I despised the way he timidly made the stop on Jackson on the play in which Scam was flagged for the hit OOB. If Stinkah isn’t so clumsy and timid on this play, that hit never happens. I also wasn’t pleased how Fitzhue was an OBSERVER, doing nothing, on all of these long, WIDE open routes down the middle of the field, in such obvious passing downs as 2d & 22, and 3rd and 14 in the 4Q. Failed to corral Snead on the 2d & 22, early 4Q. Sure, he busted up the pass on the last play of the game….which was the FIRST play he made all game long. C-
Sutton – had a FF, but the ball rolled OOB.
Layne – ok, well, we finaly saw this guy play, and he sucks ass. Couldn’t cover a picnic table with a 20 foot tarp. D-
Jordan Cherry – had an early 34 yard punt, which was shanked OOB. Got a 47 yard punt, 2Q.
Another vomity punt by Jordan Cherry, early 2H......36 yards, went OOB at the 15. To his credit, late in the game, he actually got off a solid, high, 48 yard punt that forced Balt to have to march a long way for a winning TD. B
Boswell – had no FG tries. Solid KO’s. B
RayRay – had a couple solid returns.
Edmunds committed an illegal block on the KO return after the first Balt TD.
OC: Randy Sphincter again oversaw a horrific, ghastly 1H. 3d & 10, 2nd series….and Sphincter calls a pussy-assed off tackle dive play that gained 3 yards. I despised the continual empty backfield that was used almost entirely in the 2H. Here is it, 3d and a FOOT, and this team is going empty backfield. Late in the game, faced with a 3d & 2, Sphincter calls a chickenshit dive play that was ENGULFED and stuffed, forcing a punt. In THAT situation against this defense, the line plunge has a 2% chance for moving the chains. Why not try an end around or shovel pass with Chase?? Sure, Balt might smell it out, but what have you got to lose? A first down there ENDS the game. Assuming ya don’t want to pass in order to force Balt to burn its final TO, why try to get the ball into the hands of an electric playmaker, and if he’s stopped short, it’s no worse than Conner running a plunge that gains THREE INCHES. C-
Keith Assler had the luxury of facing an offense missing its top RB, and then soon after the game started, Balt lost not one, but two starting O-lineman. Yet Assler managed to allow 179 yards rushing in the 1H, getting gashed for huge chunks of yardage on nearly every fuking play. The 2H was more of the same, with Balt continually marching down the field while running the ball on like 95% of their plays. And then there was the coverage schemes on obvious passing downs in the 4Q:
- 3d & 14....and a WR is WIDE open for a 39-yard grab. No defender within 28 feet.
- Then, 2d & 22, and no one is within 29 feet of Snead for a cake-easy catch & run of 24.
What in the sam hell ?? And its not like Balt has some glorious WR corps; their group of WRs are rather pedestrian and ordinary.
I also despised the FG drive allowed by Assler late in the 1H. A punt pinned Balt on their own 8, with just 3:44 left in the half. Then Balt rolled off FIFTEEEN fuking plays, and booted a FG as the half ended. 3d & 4, 3d & 6, 3d & 10….and Keith Assler couldn’t get the fuk off the field.
All in all, an unacceptably poor game against an injury-riddled offense. D-
HC: Mike Asslin oversaw a grisly, meek 1st half that saw the PoeBirds whip their asses up and down the field. The 2d half was a bit better, but yer not going to win all too often when allowing 260+ yards of rushing. Stoogelin was awfully lucky to win this one. B-
Synopsis: A fortuitous win over the hated Woodpeckers. We’ll gladly take the win, but it’s a greasy feeling, knowing that the RatBirds whipped the Steelers’ collective asses up and down the field the entire game. Up nectd, a road game against the lowly Cowpokes, which has all the look and feel of a Mike Asslin road egg-lay.
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